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Daily Stoic September Review – Fortitude and Resilience
The Daily Stoic is a book with 366 quotes from Stoic philosophers on how to live a good life. I had previously read this a couple years ago and benefited a lot from it, and I've decided to read it again this year. Every day, I read the quote, the explanation, and then journal my thoughts and reflections. At the end of each month, I review my reflections and summarize the month.
The theme for September is "fortitude and resilience", and this article will summarize my September reflections:
To be resilient, remember your power of choice.
Adjust your attitude.
Train for adversity during the good times.
1: To be resilient, remember your power of choice
September 6:
"You can bind up my leg, but not even Zeus has the power to break my freedom of choice."
—Epictetus
September 28:
"How appropriate that the gods put under our control only the most powerful ability that governs all the rest—the ability to make the right use of external appearances—and that they didn't put anything else under our control. Was this simply because they weren't willing to give us more? I think if it had been possible, they would have given us more, but it was impossible."
—Epictetus
In order to be strong and resilient, we must remind ourselves that no matter what happens, we can always choose how we respond. We should judge ourselves not on what happens to us, which is outside our control, but rather how we respond to what happens, which is within our control. Our freedom our choice is our greatest gift. As long as we use this gift, we will have strength.
September 14:
"Try praying differently, and see what happens: Instead of asking for 'a way to sleep with her,' try asking for 'a way to stop desiring to sleep with her.' Instead of 'a way to get rid of him,' try asking for 'a way to not crave his demise.' Instead of 'a way to not lose my child,' try asking for 'a way to lose my fear of it.'"
—Marcus Aurelius
The most foundational choice we make is our desires and expectations. If we seek something that is outside our control (i.e., external circumstances), we are bound to have disappointment. If we seek only what is in our control (i.e., our own thoughts and actions), we will have strength.
Philosophy is an inner learning and an inner seeking. Instead of wishing the outside would change, philosophers seek to adapt themselves to the circumstances. In this way, the obstacle becomes the way.
September 24:
"He [Seneca] was sentenced to commit suicide. As the historian Tacitus relates the scene, Seneca's closest friends wept and protested the verdict. 'Where,' Seneca asked them repeatedly, 'are your maxims of philosophy, or the preparations of so many years' study against evils to come? Who knew not Nero's cruelty?'"
—Ryan Holiday
I really admire Seneca's response to being framed and ordered to commit suicide by the tyrant Nero. He wasn't super scared. He practiced what Marcus Aurelius said. He did seek for a way to escape this death sentence, which is out of his control. Instead, he focused on what was in his control: how he responds. All his past learning and training of Stoicism gave him the strength he needed to face such a crisis with composure and virtue.
September 17:
"What if someone despises me? Let them see to it. But I will see to it that I won't be found doing or saying anything contemptible. What if someone hates me? Let them see to that. But I will see to it that I'm kind and good-natured to all, and prepared to show even the hater where the went wrong. Not in a critical way, or to show off my patience, but genuinely and usefully."
—Marcus Aurelius
This quote reminds me of another quote by Jim Rohn:
"Don't wish it was easier, wish you were better. Don't wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don't wish for less challenges, wish for more wisdom. The major value in life is not what you get. The major value in life is what you become. Success is not to be pursed, it is to be attracted by the person you become."
Again, philosophy is an inner seeking, meaning philosophers seek to cultivate themselves, not fix others. What others do is their matter. What I do is my matter. If I’m only kind to good people, what’s special about that? If I can be kind to even bad people and haters, then that’s true kindness, and that’s the kindness of real philosophers.
Moreover, people get influenced more through actions than words. If a person is mean to you, yet you continue to treat them with kindness, eventually, they’ll feel guilty and change their ways. Thus, when we focus on correcting ourselves, we naturally influence others to correct themselves. But if we demand others to change, we will have the energy of opposition towards them, naturally bring out their energy of opposition towards us. Thus, we shouldn't wish for the outside to change, but instead wish for ourselves to be able to respond skillfully.
My Practice
Before I used to judge myself a lot on results and on what happens to me. These things often didn’t go according to my wishes, so I had disappointment and complaints. After learning philosophy, I started to judge myself based on how I respond to circumstances, which is fully in my control. Do I respond with calm, kindness, and rationality? Or do I respond with negative emotions? After making this shift, my sense of self-confidence and peace increased gradually.
When I get annoyed at people who are rude, unreliable, excessive, or negative, I remind myself that I only have the right to manage and correct myself. Trying to manage others when they don’t even want me to is stepping out of my jurisdiction, meaning it is a wrong on my part. As long as I manage myself well, others will naturally and indirectly get influenced for the better.
2: Adjust your attitude
Most people dislike challenges, discomfort, and adversity. Philosophers wouldn’t go around seeking excessive hardship, but they do accept the fact that hardships are inevitable in life, and given that they’re inevitable, it’s better to face them positively with gratitude than to face them negatively like a helpless victim. Why should we be grateful for challenges and adversity? Because they make us stronger.
September 4:
"I judge you unfortunate because you have never lived through misfortune. You have passed through life without an opponent—no one can ever know what you are capable of, not even you."
—Seneca
Those who face little difficulty in life get accustomed to ease and leisure, making them weak in mind, spirit, and abilities. In the future, when adversity strikes, they’ll lack the resilience to handle it. Thus, their future becomes ever more dangerous. On the other hand, those who face a lot of difficulty and overcome them become strong in mind, spirit, and abilities. Their future will be bright.
September 16:
"Success comes to the lowly and to the poorly talented, but the special characteristic of a great person is to triumph over the disasters and panics of human life."
—Seneca
Greatness is not about being lucky in life. Greatness is about overcoming obstacles and mastering ourselves along the way.
September 22:
"Difficulties show a person's character. So when a challenge confronts you, remember that God is matching you with a younger sparring partner, as would a physical trainer. Why? Becoming an Olympian takes sweat! I think no one has a better challenge than yours, if only you would use it like an athlete would that younger sparring partner."
—Epictetus
This quote also reminds me of another quote by Mencius:
"When the world is about to confer a great responsibility on someone, it will exercise his mind with suffering, subject his sinews and bones to hard work, expose his body to hunger, put him to poverty, place obstacles in the paths of his deeds, so as to stimulate his mind, toughen his nature, and mend his incompetencies."
As philosophers, we seek to make the world a better place. In order to do that, we have to cultivate our virtues and abilities. If we truly have this aspiration, then we will view the inevitable challenges and difficulties in life as fuel for our growth rather than as misfortune. The more effective our attitude, the better the results.
Moreover, rarely does life give us a challenge that we cannot overcome. If we have a negative attitude, we’ll complain about all these troubles and inconveniences, and we’ll make ourselves feel terrible. If instead, we have a philosopher’s attitude, we’ll view everything as an opportunity to improve our cultivation, and we’ll have faith that we can definitely overcome these challenges and grow from them. Is that not joyful?
September 29:
"Nothing can satisfy greed, but even a small measure satisfies nature. So it is that the poverty of an exile brings no misfortune, for no place of exile is so barren as not to produce ample support for a person."
—Seneca
"When we become successful, we forget how strong we used to be. We are so used to what we have, we half believe we'd die without it…Your actual needs are small. There is very little that could happen that would truly threaten your survival. Think about that—and adjust your worries and fears accordingly."
—Ryan Holiday
Our feelings towards a situation is dependent on how we view the situation. We become emotional when we think we cannot get something that is very important to us. However, a lot of what we deem to be important might actually not be all that important or necessary. We must get clear on the must-haves versus the nice-to-haves. We really don't need much for survival. Don’t be a slave to nice-to-haves.
My Practice
I used to dislike and complain about minor troubles and inconveniences in life, and I feared adversity. After I started learning philosophy, I came to accept the fact that difficulties and adversities are inevitable in life. Given that they’re inevitable, I may as well face them with a positive attitude rather than a negative one. This is a very important choice that we have to consciously make.
I also noticed that everything I learned from philosophy are everywhere in daily life. Though the teachings are simple, they are by no means easy. Cultivating virtues and correcting vices takes a lot of perseverance and effort!
Moreover, as we elevate in ability, the world seems to give us bigger and higher challenges. But as long as we persevere and endure, we eventually overcome these challenges and feel the joy of growth. With our improved abilities, we can serve the world even more.
3: Train for adversity during the good times
September 10:
"Here's a lesson to test your mind's mettle: take part of a week in which you have only the most meager and cheap food, dress scantly in shabby clothes, and ask yourself if this is really the worst that you feared. It is when times are good that you should gird yourself for tougher times ahead, for when Fortune is kind the soul can build defenses against her ravages. So it is that soldiers practice maneuvers in peacetime, erecting bunkers with no enemies in sight and exhausting themselves under no attack so that when it comes they won't grow tired."
—Seneca
This is one of the first quotes I heard related to Stoicism, and it really resonated with me. Indeed, we should use the good times to prepare for the hard times, for hard times are guaranteed in life. In the process of preparing and training, we improve our abilities, and then we’ll feel that these hardships aren’t as hard as we imagined.
Mencius said something similar:
"Life comes from worry and hardship. Death comes from ease and enjoyment."
(生於憂患，死於安樂)
A good role model is Cato the Younger.
September 1:
"Cato the Younger had enough money to dress in fine clothing. Yet he often walked around Rome barefoot, indifferent to assumptions people made about him as he passed. He could have indulged in the finest food. He chose instead to eat simple fare. Whether it was raining or intensely hot, he went bareheaded by choice. Why not indulge in some easy relief? Because Cato was training his soul to be strong and resilient."
—Ryan Holiday
The things most people are most attached to include reputation, food, and comfort. Cato trained himself to be indifferent to these things. He let go of reputation by living like a poor person and not caring that others might view him as poor. He let go of demands towards food by eating simple fare. He let go of comfort by dressing simply and going bareheaded despite rain or heat.
Cato really practiced Seneca’s teachings. I imagine he probably gradually exposed himself to increasing levels of challenge. Slowly, he grew resistant to these things so that they wouldn’t be able to disturb his peace of mind.
September 8:
"No one is crushed by Fortune, unless they are first deceived by her…those who aren't pompous in good times, don't have their bubbles burst with change. Against either circumstance, the stable person keeps their rational soul invincible, for it's precisely in the good times they prove their strength against adversity."
—Seneca
"At any moment, we may be toppled from our perch and made to do with less—less money, less recognition, less access, less resources. Even the 'less-es' that come with age: less mobility, less energy, less freedom…So today, we can try to get used to having and surviving on less so that if we are ever forced to have less, it would not be so bad."
—Ryan Holiday
In good times, we have to maintain vigilance and not be deceived into comfort and arrogance. We can train ourselves by simulating difficult times. In difficult times, we maintain our rationality and guard against negative emotions. Thus, regardless if we are in favourable or unfavourable situations, there are virtues to cultivate and vices to guard against.
This reminds me of a quote from Lian Fan’s Four Lessons:
"In any case of destiny, we should always prepare for the worst; therefore, even in times of prosperity, you must act as if you were not prosperous, and when things are going your way, you must be mindful of adversity. When you are wealthy, be mindful of poverty, and when loved and respected by all, you must remain careful and conservative. When the family is greatly respected and revered, you must carry yourself humbly, and when your learning is broad and deep, you must not display it, but keep it humbly within."
September 23:
"Proper training can change your default habits. Train yourself to give up anger, and you won't be angry at every fresh slight. Train yourself to avoid gossip, and you won't get pulled into it. Train yourself on any habit, and you'll be able to unconsciously go to that habit in trying times. Think about which behaviors you'd like to be able to default to if you could. How many of them have you practiced only once? Let today be twice."
—Ryan Holiday
"I fear not the man who has practiced ten thousand kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick ten thousand times."
—Bruce Lee
There isn’t any secret to cultivation. If we had to say there was a secret, we might say it is specialized training. Focus on training one thing at a time, and you will master it faster. If we spread our efforts over too many things at one time, we will struggle at all of them.
Habits are not easy to change. But if we focus on changing just one habit every single day for a period of time, that habit might not be as hard to change as we imagined. The key is to have focus and patience.
Conclusion
September was all about fortitude and resilience. In order to have resilience, first, we have to remember to focus on our power of choice. No matter what happens to us, we can always choose our response, and that’s what we should judge ourselves on. Second, we need to adjust our attitude. Challenges are here to help us grow and elevate. Rather than get annoyed at them, we can view them as gifts or training for our growth. Finally, we should have vigilance and train for the tough times in the good times.
Weekly Wisdom #414
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