In the first article of this karma series, we looked at five basic rules of karma. In the second article, we looked at two stories to go into more depth on how karma requires time. In the third article, we studied four stories that showcased how karma has size and heaviness, as well as the distinction between shared and individual karma. In the fourth article, we looked at hidden versus visible karma. This article will emphasize how karma cannot be deceived. During the Kangxi reign (1661–1722) in China, there was a man by the surname Hu in Xian County. Mr. Hu was the wealthiest man in the local area. Everyone knew that he was fond of helping the poor, and he never committed any great sins. There was a poor scholar by the name of Yueping Zhang . In order to help him, Mr. Hu invited him to be a private tutor for his household. One time, during a casual chat, Mr. Zhang mentioned that his parents have already passed away, but because he lacked money, his parents' coffins were stuck in Liaodong, and he hasn't been able to bring their coffins back to their hometown for a proper burial. Because of this, he often felt guilty and sad. Hearing this, Mr. Hu immediately offered generous financial aid, sent men to help him transport the coffins back to their hometown, and donated a plot of land for the burial. Mr. Zhang was very grateful to him. Image Source Later, a dead body was discovered in Mr. Zhang's land, and the person was an old enemy of Mr. Zhang. As a result, the local authorities suspected Mr. Zhang for murder and arrested him. Mr. Zhang insisted that he was innocent, but the authorities did not believe him. Mr. Hu then used a lot of money to bribe the authorities and mediated on Mr. Zhang's behalf through various channels. Eventually, Mr. Zhang was released. Again, Mr. Zhang was extremely grateful. Image Source One day, a tragic accident happened. Mr. Zhang and his three sons were at home when a fire happened, and they all perished in the fire. It just so happened that Mrs. Zhang and the daughter were at Mrs. Zhang's parents' house, so they didn't get hurt. When Mr. Hu found out about the incident, he felt great sorrow. Knowing that the family is poor, he offered a lot of money to handle the funeral affairs for the father and the sons. Moreover, he often provided financial aid for Mrs. Zhang and her daughter and often visited them. The two of them were extremely grateful to Mr. Hu for his kindness. Image Source Mr. Hu was a generous and kind man who frequently helped the poor and saved people in their desperate times of need. He helped Mr. Zhang to bury his parents, he saved Mr. Zhang from being unjustly imprisoned, and he took care of Mr. Zhang's wife and daughter and Mr. Zhang died in a fire. Such a good person surely should receive good karmic rewards! But he did not have a good future. Instead, he and his whole family were exterminated in a rebellion. The law of karma states that doing good deeds reaps good fortune, and committing sins reaps misfortune. Why would such a good person meet such a tragic ending? Does this mean the law of karma doesn't exist? What do you think? In actuality, Mr. Hu only had the appearance of goodness, but deep down, his heart was very sinister. When Mr. Hu first met Mr. Zhang and his daughter, he immediately noticed the daughter's beauty, and his heart secretly desired her. However, Mr. Zhang was very rigid and conservative, and he refused to let his daughter become anyone's concubine. Image Source Thus, Mr. Hu first hired Mr. Zhang to be a private tutor for his household, not to give him financial aid, but rather to get closer to the daughter. He wanted to help Mr. Zhang with the burial of his parents and to save him from jail not actually to help Mr. Zhang, but rather to gain favour and trust from him and his family. How did the fire break out that day? Mr. Zhang told him that his wife and daughter were away visiting grandparents, and his three sons are still young, so he needs to ask for leave for three days to go home and look after the three sons. Mr. Hu then seized the opportunity to hire some people to go to Mr. Zhang's house that night, lock the house doors from the outside, and set fire to the house. Image Source In this way, Mrs. Zhang and the daughter would be left helpless. Mr. Hu then pretended to be shocked at this tragedy, offered them financial support, and often visited them. All of this was to get closer to the daughter and gain their trust. Since Mrs. Zhang's daughter was very beautiful and reaching marriage age, a lot of people frequently visited her to propose marriage. Mrs. Zhang trusted Mr. Hu, so she would always consult him first. Mr. Hu intentionally judged all these proposals to be unsuitable. Eventually, he offered to take Mrs. Zhang's daughter as a concubine, thereby allowing her to marry into a wealthy family. Mrs. Zhang was very grateful to Mr. Hu for his past kindness, so she was inclined to agree, but the daughter herself was unwilling. Then one night, the daughter dreamed of her late father, who said to her, "My child, if you do not agree to marry him, I won't be able to complete my plan." Image Source She took her father's words from the dream to heart and agreed to marry Mr. Hu. One year later, she gave birth to a son named Weihua Hu. Shortly after, she died of illness. When Weihua grew up, he joined a bad group of people and plotted to start a rebellion against the emperor. However, before he was fully prepared, the conspiracy was exposed. Imperial troops quickly assembled and launched a fiery assault, wiping out the rebels completely. Every single one of them was killed, including all their family members and even young children. (Story Source) Commentary In previous articles on karma, we learned that karma takes time. If we do good or bad deeds today, we don't usually get the rewards or punishments until later. Therefore, if we see good people not getting rewarded or bad people not getting punished, we cannot say that the law of karma does not exist. We also learned whether a deed is good or not depends on our intentions. Doing things with the intention to help others is good. Doing things for our own selfish benefit is bad. The thing is, people cannot read minds, so we do not know others' intentions for sure. When we see "good" people having negative karma, it's possible that they do seemingly good deeds with a selfish or sinister intention, as was the case with Mr. Hu. Having the reputation of being a good person but secretly harboring sinister intentions is a great sin. People can be deceived, but karma cannot. He set fire to Mr. Zhang and his three sons, thereby ending Mr. Zhang's family lineage. Later, Mr. Zhang's soul came to be reborn as Mr. Hu's son, and the son caused the imperial troops to launch a fiery assault on Mr. Hu's entire family. Mr. Hu died in fire the same way he caused Mr. Zhang to die, and his family lineage was ended just like what he did to Mr. Zhang. Image Source When Mr. Zhang died and became a soul, he became aware of Mr. Hu's sinister intentions, and he vowed to get revenge. Thus, we cannot deceive anyone forever, and cheating others now is guaranteeing a karmic enemy in the future. The tragic ending in their human lives is just the beginning of their karmic punishments. Mr. Hu will receive indescribable suffering in the hell realms for his sins. Mr. Zhang also committed grave karmic offenses in the process of getting revenge. He revolted against his nation and caused his entire family to be exterminated. He too will suffer punishment in the hell realm. Thus, we see that deluded people get tunnel-visioned into hatred and revenge, creating a cycle of ever worsening suffering. From this event, we see the importance of cultivating our intentions to be more selfless and pure. We also gain more faith that karma will never go wrong, and that our intentions cannot deceive others forever. Knowing this, we would naturally be motivated to accumulate goodness and avoid harming others. Weekly Wisdom #411

Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Ling was the ruler of the State of Qi (before Duke Jing). In the seventeenth year of King Ling of Zhou, the State of Jin led the forces of various feudal lords to attack the State of Qi. Duke Ling led his troops to resist at Pingyin, but he was defeated and fled, passing away the following year. After Duke Ling’s death, Duke Zhuang of Qi succeeded the throne. Duke Zhuang valued brute force and disregarded morality and ethics. He was indulgent in desires, fond of violence, and addicted to lust. As a result, the moral atmosphere of Qi declined day by day, causing widespread resentment and complaints among both the court and the general population. At the time, Yanzi served Duke Zhuang as a minister, and he repeatedly tried to advise Duke Zhuang to correct his ways. However, Duke Zhuang refused to listen and grew to dislike Yanzi. One time, while drinking wine, Duke Zhuang summoned Yanzi. After Yanzi entered and took his seat, Duke Zhuang commanded the musicians to perform a song. The lyrics of the song included a line that said, "Enough! Enough! I am displeased! What are you doing here?" Image Source: Gemini The musicians played this song three times. (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you think?) Eventually, Yanzi realized that the song was directed at him. Yanzi then left his mat, stood up, and sat directly on the ground facing north. Seeing this, Duke Zhuang asked, "What are you doing? Why are you sitting on the ground?" Yanzi replied: "I have heard that when a wife is about to argue with her husband, she sits on the ground. Today, I am about to argue with my ruler. How would I dare not sit on the ground? I have also heard that possessing a large force without advocating for righteousness, being powerful without observing propriety, and being fond of bravery while despising the virtuous is a path that invites self-destruction, where disaster will inevitably fall upon oneself, just like Your Highness's situation today. If my words of advice are not welcome here, then please allow me to resign from my current position." (Pause: If you were Duke Zhuang, what would you do?) Having finished speaking, Yanzi immediately stood up and departed quickly. Seeing him leave, Duke Zhuang made no effort to stop him. Upon returning home, Yanzi returned all valuable items in his household back to the public treasury, and sent all sellable goods to the market. Yanzi remarked: "When an exemplary person has the capability to serve the people, he enjoys rank and stipend, accepting even the most abundant rewards without refusal. But when he lacks the opportunity to serve the people, even if he must live in a foreign land as a guest and endure a poor and humble life, he should not despise it." He then walked east to live as an ordinary citizen in a small village on the coast of the East Sea. A few years later, a rebellion broke out in Qi, and Duke Zhuang was assassinated. Later, Yanzi met Duke Jing of Qi, who valued Yanzi's abilities and wisdom and invited Yanzi to help him rule the state and benefit the people. With Duke Jing, Yanzi became a renowned minister of his generation. (Story Source) Commentary Although Yanzi was extremely capable and wise, if he did not have a leader who could recognize and value his abilities, he wouldn't be able to contribute his services to the state. Confucius also faced the same situation. Thus, if we feel like our abilities are not recognized by others, we shouldn't get upset. Chances are, we're nowhere near as capable as Confucius and Yanzi. If even sages like them get ignored and misunderstood, we're all the more likely. As Confucius said in the Analects, "To not be upset when not understood by others, is this not the mark of an exemplary person?" (Original Text: 人不知而不慍不亦君子乎。) This doesn't mean we should be dejected or passive. We should always do our best to do everything in our control. Reflecting on ourselves, do we recognize our own talents and strengths? If not, how can we expect others to? If we do know our strengths, do we proactively communicate with our leader to help them leverage our strengths? If we don't communicate, they might not realize it. If we do communicate, are we respectful and patient in our communication? Otherwise, we might upset our leader. In Yanzi's case, he repeatedly tried to advise Duke Zhuang, and he was always respectful in his communication. However, Duke Zhuang disliked Yanzi and even indirectly told him to leave. Duke Zhuang accelerated his demise by eliminating wise and virtuous ministers from his side. Yanzi was extremely loyal and devoted to the state. I would guess that if the Duke didn't tell him to leave like that, Yanzi would not have left. If the Duke was willing to listen to him, Yanzi would serve the Duke with all his life. If when Yanzi got up to leave, the Duke stopped him and asked him to stay, Yanzi definitely would have. Alas, the Duke indeed wanted Yanzi to leave. One might wonder why Yanzi didn't just play dumb and stay. The way I see the situation, if Yanzi didn't leave, it wouldn’t have benefited anyone. The Duke would think Yanzi is either rebellious for not obeying his indirect orders to leave, or that he is stupid for not getting the message. Either way, he wouldn't suddenly have a change of heart and listen to Yanzi. He might have even decided to harm Yanzi. If the Duke harmed a virtuous minister like Yanzi, it would cause even more resentment from the court and the people. Thus, in Yanzi's situation, it seems like the best option was indeed to leave. Relating back to ourselves, if we are not satisfied with our current leader, we shouldn't just leave on a whim. Yanzi tried repeatedly to advise and change his leader. When the Duke indirectly told him to leave, Yanzi felt bad that he didn't have the ability to change his leader. He also asked to leave in a very respectful and humble manner. He first sat on the ground, which places him in a lower position. That is a formality to show humility. He then said, "If my words of advice are not welcome here, then please allow me to resign from my current position." He did not say, "You clearly don't welcome my advice, so I will resign." Moreover, it was clear that Yanzi always held firmly to morality. Since he felt ashamed that he couldn't influence his ruler, he gave back all the wealth that he got from his position back to the court and the people. When he went to live in a small village, I imagine he probably continued studying and improving his abilities so that in the future, he might be able to provide greater value to the people. As Mencius said, "In times of lack, focus on improving yourself. In times of prominence, concurrently improve the world." (Original Text: 窮則獨善其身，達則兼善天下。) Image Source Later, Duke Jing came to power and allowed Yanzi to bring out his potential. I'm not sure how Duke Jing met Yanzi, but I imagine that when he came to power, he wanted to employ good ministers. Other ministers probably told him about Yanzi being very capable and wise. Thus, Duke Jing decided to meet Yanzi. Since Yanzi continued to hone his studies and abilities, when the Duke met him, he was very impressed by Yanzi. Of course, another key factor is that their aspirations also aligned, which is to benefit the people and rule through virtue. Conclusion From this story, we can learn to not be upset when others don't recognize our abilities, and instead focus on improving ourselves so that our abilities deserve to be recognized. We can also learn to be patient. If our current leader does not recognize our strengths, perhaps they will later, or another leader will in the future. Weekly Wisdom #410

The Daily Stoic is a book with 366 quotes from Stoic philosophers on how to live a good life. I had previously read this a couple years ago and benefited a lot from it, and I've decided to read it again this year. Every day, I read the quote, the explanation, and then journal my thoughts and reflections. At the end of each month, I review my reflections and summarize the month. The theme for August is "pragmatism", and this article will summarize my August reflections: Set realistic expectations Have clear perception Adapt to any situation Focus on action Practice reduction Image Source: GPT 1: Set Realistic Expectations When things don’t go according to our expectations, we become upset and unhappy. What’s the solution? Most people try to change the outside. However, outside circumstances and people are not in our control, so such efforts might not reap good results. To solve the problem from the root, we adjust our own expectations. August 1: "The cucumber is bitter, so toss it out! There are thorns on the path, then keep away! Enough said. Why ponder the existence of nuisance? Such thinking would make you a laughing-stock to the true student of Nature, just as a carpenter or cobbler would laugh if you pointed out the sawdust and chips on the floors of their shops. Yet while those shopkeepers have dustbins for disposal, Nature has no need of them." —Marcus Aurelius August 4: "You must stop blaming God, and not blame any person. You must completely control your desire and shift your avoidance to what lies within your reasoned choice. You must no longer feel anger, resentment, envy, or regret." —Epictetus Firstly, we should establish the expectation that problems are normal in life. In this way, we wouldn’t get upset so easily. Second, we shouldn’t blame other people or external circumstances for our feelings. Instead, focus on taking productive action. For example, if we eat a cucumber, and it tastes normal, we wouldn’t give it a second thought. But if the cucumber is bitter, we get upset because we think “This cucumber shouldn’t be bitter. That’s not normal. This is a problem. This bitter cucumber ruined my meal.” When this happens, we remind ourselves, “Problems are normal in life. No need to make a big deal out of it. Besides, fussing doesn’t help. Focus on taking productive action.” Cultivating our mind and thoughts like this is solving our problems from the root. August 29: "No person has the power to have everything they want, but it is in their power to not want what they don't have, and to cheerfully put to good use what they do have." —Seneca This is one of my favorite quotes of all time. It teaches us how to avoid suffering: by simply not wanting that which we cannot obtain. This power belongs to everyone. It also teaches us to be happy and productive: by cheerfully putting to good use what we already have. My Practice My personality is the type that likes to plan things in advance, and when things don’t go according to my plan, I easily get annoyed. After learning Stoicism, I became better. I remind myself in the morning that I will encounter problems and inconsiderate people; it’s just a fact of life. When this happens, maintain my own calmness and kindness; this is my cultivation. By reminding myself every single morning, I slowly became better at not overreacting to problems. 2: Have Clear Perception When problems arise, it’s important to see the situation clearly and accurately. Only then can we improve the situation and solve the problem. If our perception and judgment get distorted by emotions, then we will make things worse. August 9: "Don't tell yourself anything more than what the initial impressions report. It's been reported to you that someone is speaking badly about you. This is the report—the report wasn't that you've been harmed. I see that my son is sick—but not that his life is at risk. So always stay within your first impressions, and don't add to them in your head—this way nothing can happen to you." —Marcus Aurelius The mind has a tendency to amplify bad news. When this happens, we need to remind ourselves to get clear on the facts, and to separate facts from feelings. If we can do this mental training, then we will have stability of mind. August 22: "It is essential for you to remember that the attention you give to any action should be in due proportion to its worth, for then you won't tire and give up, if you aren't busying yourself with lesser things beyond what should be allowed." —Marcus Aurelius Here, Marcus Aurelius is talking about the Middle Way, which Confucius and the Buddha also taught. We want to do everything to the right degree, not excessive, nor deficient. If a problem is a minor problem, don’t get overly stressed about it. If a problem is a major problem, don’t neglect it. If we only have 30% control over a matter, then don’t try to manage 50%. That would be unnecessary clinging. At the same time, don’t just manage 20%; that would be irresponsible. Give matters their due worth. Or in Buddhist terms, accord with the situation. August 27: "Heraclitus would shed tears whenever he went out in public—Democritus laughed. One saw the whole as a parade of miseries, the other of follies. And so, we should take a lighter view of things and bear them with an easy spirit, for it is more human to laugh at life than to lament it." —Seneca Whether we laugh or cry in response to situations is dependent on our perception, which is in our control. A lot of people think Stoics are overly serious, but actually, they enjoy life. If learning philosophy makes us depressed, then we’re learning it wrong. When we adjust our thinking to be more effective, we should feel more peace and happiness. My Practice When I get overly emotional, whether it’s anger, fear, worry, or even excitement, I tell myself to not make decisions. I need to wait until my emotions are peaceful again to make decisions because excessive emotion clouds judgment. The Middle Way is not hard to understand, but it’s very difficult in practice. It requires wisdom, and wisdom comes from a peaceful state of mind, as well as from accumulated learning and life experience. That’s why I allocate time every day for meditation and learning. I have a rather serious personality, so I need to work on being more light-hearted to be more Stoic. Humor isn’t just for myself; it’s also helpful to relieve tension for others. When I actually intentionally tried to have more humor in life, I found that I actually could do it. Like changing any habit, it just takes conscious effort and practice. 3: Adapt To Any Situation Hoping problems won’t arise is not pragmatic. Improving our adaptability is. When we have confidence in our adaptability, then any situation is a good situation. August 3: "At this moment you aren't on a journey, but wandering about, being driven from place to place, even though what you seek—to live well—is found in all places. Is there any place more full of confusion than the Forum? Yet even there you can live at peace, if needed." —Seneca Philosophy is an inner seeking, not an outer seeking. We seek happiness and peace of mind from within ourselves, from cultivating our mind. If a person believes that they need a certain external environment or condition to be happy, then that person is not a philosopher. Even in hectic and difficult situations in which most people would feel chaotic, the philosopher can remain composed. August 6: "Apply yourself to thinking through difficulties—hard times can be softened, tight squeezes widened, and heavy loads made lighter for those who can apply the right pressure." —Seneca August 16: "Just as the nature of rational things has given to each person their rational powers, so it also gives us this power—just as nature turns to its own purpose any obstacle or any opposition, sets its place in the destined order, and co-opts it, so every rational person can convert any obstacle into the raw material for their own purpose." —Marcus Aurelius When difficulties and obstacles arise, we shouldn’t think, “Ugh. Why me. This is so hard. This is so troublesome.” Stoicism teaches us to make use of that obstacle to elevate our cultivation and move us closer towards our goal, just like how fire makes fuel out of everything. When we can use obstacles to our advantage, we’ll gain great satisfaction and confidence. August 20: "Inwardly, we ought to be different in every respect, but our outward dress should blend in with the crowd." —Seneca The goal of philosophy and cultivation is to have better relationships, which then creates happiness. If we purposely make ourselves very different from others, causing them to dislike us or oppose us, then we’ve fallen off the proper path. We should accord with others and let them see that they too can practice philosophy. For example, if you come from a wealthy family, don’t force yourself to live a poor life. Your family might think you’re going crazy. Instead, practice the teachings of philosophy as a wealthy person. Be a role model of a wealthy philosopher. That would be being different on the inside while blending in on the outside. My Practice As mentioned before, I tend to rigidly cling to plans, so when unexpected problems occur, I get flustered easily. After learning philosophy, I’ve focused on cultivating my adaptability. I’ve found that it really just takes belief and practice. I tell myself, “Although this is not according to my plan, this is a chance to improve my adaptability. I can definitely find some good use of this obstacle.” After learning philosophy, my life values and my standards for good and bad have become different from the crowd. However, I still accord with others and let them feel that we can relate. For example, I used to really enjoy gaming and drinking milk tea with friends. Now, I don’t seek pleasure from these things anymore. However, I don’t look down on others if they do. Moreover, if I’m with friends who like to game and drink milk tea, I can happily accompany them. In the process, I’ll also try to share with them some useful wisdom relevant to their life. It’s because I can adapt myself to them that they would communicate with me. Thus, if we want to benefit others, it’s important that we can accord with them. 4: Focus on Action Learning philosophy isn’t just to accumulate knowledge. Philosophy emphasizes action and practice. Only through application can we gain benefit. August 12: "Many words have been spoken by Plato, Zeno, Chrysippus, Posidonius, and by a whole host of equally excellent Stoics. I'll tell you how people can prove their words to be their own—by putting into practice what they've been preaching." —Seneca August 14: "Philosophy isn't a parlor trick or made for show. It's not concerned with words, but with facts. It's not employed for some pleasure before the day is spent, or to relieve the uneasiness of our leisure. It shapes and builds up the soul, it gives order to life, guides action, shows what should and shouldn't be done—it sits at the rudder steering our course as we vacillate in uncertainties. Without it, no one can live without fear or free from care. Countless things happen every hour that require advice, and such advice is to be sought out in philosophy." —Seneca Ultimately, philosophy teaches us to use our mind effectively, which then gives us freedom and peace of mind. To do so, we need to know how to use our mind, and then we need to practice. Knowing how doesn’t take too much time. Practice requires much more time and effort. But as Seneca says, countless things happen every hour that puts our mind to work, so we have countless practice opportunities every day. If we make good use of these opportunities, our cultivation will improve quickly. If we don’t seize these practice opportunities, then more learning isn’t going to help. In fact, it might even harm us by making us arrogant (because we think we know a lot). In reality, knowing without doing should be a reason for shame not pride. August 11: "When the problem arose for us whether habit or theory was better for getting virtue—if by theory is meant what teaches us correct conduct, and by habit we mean being accustomed to act according to this theory—Musonius thought habit to be more effective." —Musonius Rufus The work of philosophy is to cultivate virtues. Knowing is just the first step. Practice is the second step. We have to keep practicing until it becomes a habit. When virtuous behavior becomes our instinctive first response, then it’s become a habit, and we can be said to possess that virtue firmly. August 13: "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." —Benjamin Franklin Icon Source Even more pragmatic than handling problems effectively is to prevent them from arising. To do that, we need to learn from every experience and think about how we could prevent similar problems from arising in the future. This might sound obvious, but common sense is often not common practice. Just ask yourself, have you ever repeated the same mistake over and over again? If so, then perhaps you haven’t put enough effort into prevention work. Stephen Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, also taught that if we want to prevent urgent problems from arising, we have to dedicate enough time to the important but non-urgent things, such as our health and relationships. Neglecting these things in the short-term might not have major consequences, but the effects are accumulating. Once they reach a tipping point, disaster will befall. Thus, it’s important to allocate enough time to these important but non-urgent matters. My Practice I’ve always been a pragmatic type of person. When I learned things in school, I always thought about how it would be useful in my life. This kind of attitude helped me benefit from learning philosophy. Philosophy is kind of like an instruction manual for making good decisions and living a good life. We just have to remember to use the manual! I’ve also experienced first-hand the difficulty of changing bad habits into good ones, or changing vices into virtues. It really takes patience and persistence. But the satisfaction that comes with our improvement is definitely worth it. In the process of correcting habits, we shouldn’t get impatient and think, “Why do I still keep making that mistake? Why haven’t I changed yet?” Have the expectation that it will require hundreds of repetitions or many months of effort to see noticeable improvement (not perfection). As long as we are patient and persistent, we’ll slowly change without even noticing it. In terms of problem prevention, when I make a mistake, I will ask myself: Is this a new mistake or a repeat mistake? If it’s a new mistake, how can I prevent it next time? If it’s a repeat mistake, why do I keep repeating it? If it’s because I haven’t found the root cause, then I need to find the root cause. Perhaps ask others for advice. If it’s simply a habit problem, then I need to persist in my cultivation. I also make sure I spend time on important non-urgent things every day, such as for my health and relationships. 5: Practice Reduction A lot of times, we try to improve our lives by adding more. But for a lot of us, it’s better to focus on simplifying and reducing first. August 19: "It is said that if you would have peace of mind, busy yourself with little. But wouldn't a better saying be do what you must and as required of a rational being created for public life? For this brings not only the peace of mind of doing few things, but the greater peace of doing them well. Since the vast majority of our words and actions are unnecessary, corralling them will create an abundance of leisure and tranquility. As a result, we shouldn't forget at each moment to ask, is this one of the unnecessary things? But we must corral not only unnecessary actions but unnecessary thoughts, too, so needless acts don't tag along after them." —Marcus Aurelius A lot of us waste a lot of energy on unnecessary things, including actions, speech, and even thoughts. Here, Marcus Aurelius is teaching us to always ask, “Is this necessary”? If it’s necessary, do a good job at it. If it’s not necessary, don’t waste energy on it. August 5: "The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish, blow past opportunities, ignore feedback, and cause yourself suffering. The inexperienced and fearful talk to reassure themselves. The ability to listen, to deliberately keep out of a conversation and subsist without its validity is rare. Silence is a way to build strength and self-sufficiency." —Ryan Holiday Some people talk too much, others talk too little. But if we had to compare the two, probably more people talk too much. The Book of Changes says, “Auspicious people speak few words. Agitated people speak many words.” In other words, if we want to have good fortune, it’s important to not talk too much. Why? Because talking too much reflects an agitated state of mind, and an agitated state of mind will tend to make poor decisions. Not to mention that no one likes a person who can’t stop talking, and everyone likes a person who respectfully listens to them. We can all gain more fortune by practicing speaking more concisely, clearly, and steadily. We should also try to listen more and make others feel understood and respected. These are all ways to cultivate our mind to be calmer and more stable. My Practice I keep a to-do list that is ordered by priority. I know I never have enough time to do everything on my list, so I focus on getting the few most important things done for that day. I tend to talk too much and too fast, which reflects my agitated state of mind. I have been working on talking more concisely and steadily for many years. I’m certainly better than before, but I still have a lot of room for improvement. Conclusion August was all about pragmatism. If we want to be pragmatic and good at dealing with problems, then first, we need to set realistic expectations. We need to view problems as normal and focus on taking productive action. Secondly, we need to have clear perception. Don’t let excessive emotions distort our perception. Third, focus on adapting ourselves to the situation and use the obstacle to our advantage. Pragmatism is action-oriented, so in everything that we learn in philosophy, we should think about how we can use it in our daily life, and then go practice the teachings until they become habit. Finally, practice reduction by only doing, saying, and thinking what is necessary. How could you improve your pragmatism? Weekly Wisdom #409

Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. Yanzi was known to be extremely wise and helped the Duke greatly to govern the nation. One time, Duke Jing's beloved concubine, Yingzi, tragically passed away. Duke Jing was consumed by grief. He kept watch beside her body for three consecutive days without eating, driven to total despair—so much so that his clothes were disheveled, his skin was exposed, and he leaned against his mat, refusing to leave her side. Image Source: Gemini (Pause: If you were one of Duke Jing's advisors, what would you say to him?) Seeing this, the close attendants and ministers tried repeatedly to advise him, but Duke Jing ignored them all. Yanzi then entered to seek an audience and reported to Duke Jing, "Your Highness, a shaman and a physician have arrived, saying that upon hearing of Lady Yingzi's passing, they are willing to come and cure her." Hearing this, Duke Jing was startled. He immediately stood up from the bedside and asked eagerly and with pleasant surprise, "Is there still hope for her condition?" Yanzi replied, "This is what the shaman and physician claim. Since they are famous doctors in the land, why not let them try? May Your Highness cast aside impurity, bathe, eat, and leave this place for a moment. I hear the shaman will drive away evil, ward off disaster, and perform sacrifices to the spirits." Overjoyed, Duke Jing nodded repeatedly and said, "Excellent!" He then left Yingzi’s residence, returned to his palace to bathe, cleanse himself, and begin eating. As soon as Duke Jing left, Yanzi immediately gave the order for the undertakers to place Yingzi's body into her coffin. Once the encoffinment was complete, Yanzi went to Duke Jing’s residence to report: "The physician was unable to cure her, and Lady Yingzi’s body has already been placed in the coffin. I dared not refrain from informing Your Highness." Hearing this, Duke Jing felt as though cold water had been poured over him. Deeply displeased, his face instantly darkened, and he said, "You used the doctor’s words to order me around, preventing me from personally watching her treatment. You proceeded with the encoffinment without reporting to me beforehand. Looking at it this way, my role as the ruler of Qi is nothing more than a title without substance!" (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you say?) Hearing this, Yanzi replied: "Does Your Highness truly not know the truth that the dead cannot return to life? I have heard that when a ruler leads uprightly and ministers act according to his orders, this is obedience; when a ruler acts outrageously and ministers still blindly obey, this is rebellion. Today, Your Highness’s leadership is improper. You associate with those who flatter you and drive away those who point and pros and cons. Slanderers and flatterers rise rapidly, while the wise and good are dismissed. This allows treacherous people to run rampant by your side, causing wicked acts and tyrannical behavior to crisscross throughout the land. In the past, our former ruler Duke Huan appointed the wise Guan Zhong and achieved hegemony. Later, he chose to associate with the treacherous Shu Diao and met his ruin. Today, Your Highness disregards propriety towards virtuous men, yet treats the funeral of a beloved concubine with great extravagance. Although the ancient sage kings each had their personal loves, they never allowed personal feelings to taint their righteous conduct. Encoffining the dead is a way to show love, but it must not cause one to lose the proper measure of love; sending off the dead can express grief, but it must not cause one to lose the proper measure of grief. If righteous conduct is damaged, one will sink into the abyss of indulgence in personal affection and be unable to extricate oneself. Expressing love excessively harms the body, and grieving beyond measure destroys one's life. Therefore, the ancient sage kings restrained their personal desires so they would not exceed proper boundaries. When a person dies, they should be buried immediately; one must not continue treating them as if alive due to delayed encoffinment. One must not harm the livelihoods of the living for the sake of extravagant coffins and burial clothes, nor harm one's survival through excessive weeping and grief. Today, the body is already decomposing, yet you are treating the body as if alive. This is growing your personal attachment and losing proper conduct, over-focusing on the deceased with unceasing grief that harms your survival. A ruler acting in this way is in the wrong. Therefore, distinguished guests visiting from other states feel ashamed to serve as envoys to our country, and ministers at our court feel disgraced in performing their duties. Promoting Your Highness's words and deeds cannot inspire the people; yielding to Your Highness's personal desires cannot sustain the nation. Furthermore, I have heard that letting a body rot without burial is called 'defiling the corpse,' and leaving foul odors uncollected is called 'exposing rotting flesh.' Doing this violates the nature of enlightened kings, invites public criticism from the people, and subjects your beloved concubine to defilement and disgrace. This can absolutely not be permitted!" Duke Jing was shocked upon hearing this and said with shame, "I was ignorant. It is only through your vast learning and knowledge that I have come to understand these principles of conduct!" Seeing that Duke Jing had accepted his words, Yanzi added, "The high officials and ministers of our country, as well as the guests from neighboring states, are all waiting outside the palace for your command. I hope Your Highness can cease your weeping and restrain your grief to adapt to the change." When Confucius heard of this matter, he could not help but praise: "Although the stars in the sky are bright, they can never match the sun and moon under a cloudy sky. Though small matters may each achieve success, they fall far short compared to great endeavors yet to be completed. Though exemplary people may employ tactful deception, it is far superior to the petty deeds and speech of petty people. Is this not referring to Yanzi?" Commentary While we may shake our heads at Duke Jing for actually believing that a shaman could bring a dead person back to life, can we be sure that we wouldn't make the same mistake? I'm not referring to the matter, but rather the Duke's state of mind. The Great Learning says, "When one has anger, the mind is not rectified. When one has fear, the mind is not rectified. When one has biases, the mind is not rectified. When one has worries, the mind is not rectified." (Original Text: 身有所忿懥，則不得其正；有所恐懼，則不得其正；有所好樂，則不得其正；有所憂患，則不得其正。) Why would the Duke believe such a foolish thing? Because he was overly attached to Yingzi, causing his mind to become "unrectified", meaning irrational and improper. His desire for her to live was so strong that he was willing to believe anything if he could get what he wanted. Have you ever wanted something so badly that you couldn't stop thinking about it, and you refused to listen to opposing views? That's an omen for trouble, and it's making the same mistake as Duke Jing. In order to guard ourselves from making the same mistake as Duke Jing, we need to cultivate detachment and emotional stability. If we start getting overly emotional, we need to notice it, pause, and calm ourselves down. Perhaps that's through taking a walk, or having a bath, or meditating; whatever works for you. Once we are calm, we will recover rationality, and then we can make decisions. Although we strive to cultivate emotional stability, we don't demand others to do the same. We learn these stories for the purpose of cultivation. Cultivation is about cultivating ourselves, not others. If our attention is always on other people's faults and on correcting others, not only will they get upset at us, we've also polluted our peace of mind with anger, and we've violated the virtues of kindness and humility. Yanzi and many of the palace attendants urged Duke Jing to let go of his emotional attachment towards the deceased concubine and instead focus on his duty as ruler. When the Duke didn't listen, Yanzi didn't get upset or judgmental. If he did, he probably would've scolded the Duke, and then the Duke, in his already emotional state, would get upset and order for Yanzi to be punished. Advising an irrational leader is very difficult. If you upset them, you put yourself in danger. However, if you don't urge them to do what's right, you're violating morality. In such a situation, wisdom is crucial, and wisdom comes from a calm state of mind and from learning (such as through stories like these!). Yanzi's devotion, courage, and wisdom were shown through his tactful deception. If his state of mind was disturbed by negative emotion, he would not have been able to handle the situation so tactfully. Ultimately, deceiving the Duke has its risks. If the Duke gets angry, Yanzi could be punished severely. He might even lose his life. Based on other stories, we've seen the Duke sentence others to death over small things like accidentally killing his beloved horse. Yanzi surely knew this, but he still chose to move forward with his plan. On one hand, he was willing to sacrifice his life for the sake of the nation. On the other hand, he had enough confidence that he could win over the Duke such that it was worth the risk. This shows Yanzi's courage and devotion to his ruler and the nation. He'd rather risk his life to help the greater good than violate his sense of morality. Some people may also have courage and devotion, but they lack the wisdom to actually think of a tactful method and then the stability of mind to execute it. Yanzi understood that when someone is very emotional, it's hard to get them out of that emotional state. In that case, it's not effective to oppose them head on. Instead, we should go with their flow and then redirect it. In this case, other people all told the Duke to stop grieving for Yingzi. When Yanzi saw that this method wasn't going to work, he decided to go with the Duke's emotions and told him that Yingzi has a chance to be saved. This stopped the Duke's grieving, and he was willing to listen to Yanzi. Later, Yanzi also calmly and bravely told the Duke the truth. When the Duke got angry, Yanzi was able to state his reasoning calmly and respectfully, without any sense of blame or opposition against the Duke. His sincerity and respect got through to the Duke, and the Duke felt that Yanzi had the best intentions for him and the nation, and that what Yanzi did was indeed correct. The key thing to learn from Yanzi here is his virtues, not the act of using deception. From Yanzi's example, we can see three prerequisites to using tactful deception. First, our intention should be to help others, not to benefit ourselves. Second, it's a last resort. If we have other options, then using deception is inappropriate. Third, we are willing to reveal the truth and face the other person's anger. This all requires us to cultivate selflessness, stability of mind, and wisdom. In my own experience, I've rarely had to resort to deception, but I do remember one time, my grandma in China got injured, and she lives alone, so my mom and I rushed back from Canada. My dad was working in America at the time, and he couldn't leave his work right away, so we told him that we would check out the situation first. After we arrived back in China, grandma's situation got better. We knew that grandma really wanted to see her son, but she didn't want to pressure him to come back. Thus, we told my dad that grandma might not have too much time, and we urged him to come back. In this way, we helped to fulfill grandma's wish without making it seem like grandma is pressuring dad, and we urged dad to do the morally right thing. When he did arrive, my grandma was really happy and relieved, and we told him that grandma's condition improved a lot because she's so happy to see us. Conclusion Have you ever lost your rationality because of being overly emotional and attached to something? How would you guard against that in the future? Have you ever encountered others being overly emotional? How might you learn from Yanzi to advise them better? Weekly Wisdom #408

Recently, I've been at my grandma's place in China. I have many cousins, and a lot of them have children. They know I'm an English teacher, so they asked if I could help tutor their kids while I'm at my grandma's place. For context, in China, there are three compulsory subjects: Chinese literature, math, and English. Moreover, the higher your grades, the better the school you can attend. The better the school, the cheaper the tuition. One cousin's son is entering grade 9, and she told me that her son is excellent at math, but his English is really dragging him down. If his son could raise his English score by a small amount, it would literally save her tens of thousands of dollars in his future tuition costs, so she really hopes I can tutor him English. I asked my grandma for her opinion, and she really hoped I can tutor him too. Thus, even though I had other work to do, I decided to prioritize tutoring my nephew. However, another important condition is that he himself wants to learn. The mother told me she really dislikes English. Therefore, in my first session with him, I said, "If you want me to tutor you, you have to want to learn. If you don't want to learn, I won't force you. I'll just tell your mom that I'm busy and then you won't have to come back tomorrow. But since we're here today, let's just try it first. My goal isn't to get you to like English. If you want, I might be able to help you get a higher score in English and not feel like English is so troublesome." He was very receptive to that. After we started learning, he got really into it. I would ask him, "Do you want a break? Do you want to keep learning?" He always wanted to learn more. After I started tutoring him, other family members found out, and then more nephews and nieces came to learn. They seem to really enjoy learning from me. My guess is that at school, each class has 40 to 50 students, so the teacher doesn't give much personal attention to individual students, but they get a lot of attention and interaction from me. Moreover, I'm an English native, so they want to learn pronunciation from me. I taught them for a total of five days, and the night before my last day of class with them, I had a vivid dream. In the dream, I was lecturing about how to have successful life, and I talked about three things: filial piety, service mindset, and humility. When I woke up, I felt quite perplexed. I've never had a dream like that before. Then I thought, maybe it's because today is my last day of class with them, and since they seem to like me and trust me, I should impart some important life wisdom to them. So later that day, after I finished teaching all the English content, I told them about my dream, and that I want to give them some parting advice. They were all very curious. Me: "Why do your parents want you to get a high grade in school?" Them: "So we can get into a better school." Me: "And then?" Them: "We can get a better job." Me: "And then?" Them: "We can make more money." Me: "And then?" Them: "We will be happy." Me: "OK, so the ultimate goal is to be happy. Let me ask then, are there people out there who have a lot of money but are unhappy?" Them: "Yes." Me: "Exactly. If you are starving and don't have enough money for basic necessities, then making more money will greatly improve your happiness. But if you already have enough, then more money won't do that much for your happiness. Image Source Besides, basic necessities don't require that much money. Also, there is one big key to your happiness and success, whether at school or in your future career. Do you know what that is?" Them: "Intelligence?" Me: "Nope. " Them: "Luck?" Me: "Actually, I would use the word 'fortune'. 'Luck' sounds like it's out of our control. But fortune is something we can accumulate. If you want to encounter good teachers, good classmates, a good workplace, these all require fortune. Do you know how to accumulate fortune?" Them: "Nope" Me: "Fortune is created from our heart, from our attitude. For example, these past few days, you all got private tutoring from me all day. That's fortune. Your classmates did not have the same opportunity. If other people wanted to get this many hours of private tutoring from me, it would be quite expensive! Why did you have this fortune? Because of your attitude. You were all very eager to learn and very respectful to your parents and me. You parents asked you to come, and you listened. When I taught in class, you listened respectfully. I often asked you guys if you want to take a break, but you guys said no. You would learn all day and not get tired. I am touched by your eagerness to learn, so I am willing to give you more of my time. Thus, your attitude created fortune for you. Anyway, the key factor for our happiness and success that I wanted to say is relationships. If we have happy relationships, we will be happy. Moreover, if we want to do well at school, we need to have good relationships with our teachers and classmates. If we want to succeed in the workplace, we need to have good relationships with our leaders and colleagues. There is one key relationship that serves as the foundation for all your other relationships. Do you know which one that is?" Them: "Our relationship with parents?" Me: "Yes! There's a Chinese saying: Of all virtues, which comes first?" Them: "Filial piety." Me: "Exactly. Our relationship with parents is our first relationship, and we nurture our early habits in that relationship. If someone often argues with their parents, do you think they can manage to not argue with other people?" Them: "No." Me: "If someone isn't considerate and respectful to their parents, who raised them and gave them the most, do you think they can truly be considerate and respectful towards other people?" Them: "No." Me: "Exactly. If they are nice to you but not their parents, it's only because they want something from you. It's not sincere. If you cannot benefit them anymore, they won't care about you. So the first important thing I want to tell you guys is to be filial. Strive to make your parents happy and to resolve their worries. Image Source Be more understanding and patient towards them. Try to reduce their burden. Help out around the house. Give them massages. Spend quality time with them. If you can have a good relationship with your parents, you will have a good foundation for your interpersonal relationships, and you will create a lot of fortune. Second is to have a service mindset. If a person merely seeks pleasure and self-gratification in life, then that's a petty life. Our value in life is determined by how we serve and help others. That's why I hope you guys will share what you learned from me with others. Your classmates probably struggle with English too. What you learned can help them. Helping others creates fortune for us. For example, let's say today, Wendy helps Lisa. Lisa, how would you feel?" Lisa: "Thankful." Me: "Would you look for a chance to return the favor later?" Lisa: "Of course." Me: "Exactly. So helping others creates fortune for ourselves. What goes around comes around. Moreover, even if Wendy never sees Lisa again, Wendy might get help from someone else. The fortune will definitely come back to her. Of course, we're not helping others because we want them to return the favor; that's just a side effect. We help others because we want others to be happy, and when we make others happy, we naturally feel happy too. So where should we start practicing our service mindset?" Them: "At home?" Me: "You guys are so smart! Indeed. Home is where we nurture our early habits. If at home, we're always looking for chores to do, for how we can help out, then when we go to other places, we'll naturally look for ways to help out. For example, at the family gathering last week, after we finished eating, we could go take the elders' bowls and offer to help wash it. Only after all the chores are done do we go to our room and play games. At school, we might take initiative to tidy the classroom. In the workplace, we might take initiative to ask the leader if there's anything else we can do. When elders and leaders see us taking initiative to help out, they will think, 'This person is helpful. I should cultivate this person. I should give them more opportunities to develop and grow." Getting preferential treatment from elders and leaders is also fortune." Them: "But what if my parents don't let me help? For example, I offered to help my mom chop vegetables, and she told me no need." Me: "That's fine. The important thing is that you have this sense that you should help out, and that you ask if there's anything you can help with. If she doesn't want you to chop vegetables, you can ask if there's anything else you can help with. If she says no, then it's fine. Or if you really want to help, you can say you want to learn. Or you keep asking at different times, and eventually, your mom will realize your sincerity and let you help out. OK, so that's service mindset. The last thing is humility. Humility means being willing to accept other people's criticism and being grateful for it. Even more humble is asking others for their criticism and advice. Humble people are always learning and improving. Humble people have harmonious relationships because they listen to other people's criticism instead of arguing. If you give someone advice to improve, but they are unhappy about it and argue with you, would you want to give them advice again in the future?" Them: "No." Me: "Exactly. We all have faults and problems, and it's hard for us to see them. Other people can see our problems more clearly. If we are humble, others will happily tell us, and then we can improve. That's fortune. If we are not humble, then others won't help us, and we'll keep suffering from our faults. That's misfortune. In the workplace, whether or not a leader wants to promote you depends largely on your humility. If the leader criticizes you and you start arguing back, then the leader will think this person is not trainable, and the leader won't promote you. So we see the importance of humility. Again, where does the practice of humility begin?" Them: "At home?" Me: "Indeed. Parents know us the best, so they will often lecture us on our problems. If we often argue with them, then we are not humble. If we can accept their advice, thank them for it, and tell them that we will work on it, and then actually work on it, then we are humble. It's not like parents expect us to change in an instant. They just want to know that we understand their worries, that we take their advice seriously, and that we are willing to work on it. Then they will feel relieved. OK those are the three things I wanted to tell you guys. Simple to understand, but not easy to do. I am still working on these too. But they are very important for our life and for accumulating fortune. Let's do a quick review. What are the three things?" Them: "Be good to parents. Service mindset. Humility." Image Source: GPT Me: "Excellent! Let's go eat dinner." Commentary The Sixth Patriarch of Zen Buddhism, Hui Neng, said, "All the fields of fortune are inseparable from the heart." Buddhism teaches that there are three major fields of fortune: The field of gratitude The field of respect The field of compassion Icon Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Notice that these are all attitudes and virtues. When we cultivate these virtues, we are planting seeds in these fortune fields. These seeds take time to mature, but eventually, when the time is ripe, we will receive our harvest. 1: Gratitude The first field of fortune is gratitude. A person who has a heart of gratitude will often think of the kindness that others have given them. As a result, they will feel very happy and contented in life. Happiness is a form of fortune. Moreover, they will often think about how to give back to others. They have motivation to serve others, which then makes others want to give back to them. That's also fortune. Cicero said, "Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others." Gratitude gives us motivation to improve ourselves and cultivate other virtues. For example, when we are grateful for other people's contributions, we will naturally treat them with the virtues of respect and consideration. When we are grateful for other people's advice, we will have humility. When we are grateful for challenges, we will have adaptability and perseverance. When we are grateful for other people's trust, we will develop our trustworthiness. And so on. For most of us, our parents gave us the most. They gave us our life! When we were infants and couldn't take care of ourselves, they took care of us 24/7. Everything we needed, they strived to provide. Thus, the first people to be grateful for are our parents. When we hold a heart of gratitude towards our parents, we will naturally do things to make them happy and avoid making them unhappy. We will do chores around the house to reduce our parents' burden. As a result, we improve our diligence, abilities, and self-confidence. That's all fortune. We would also study hard at school. As a result, we become intelligent, and we attract the help of teachers and classmates. That's also fortune. We would also listen to our parents' criticism and work hard to correct ourselves so that our parents wouldn't worry. Self-improvement creates fortune. As mentioned before, our relationship with parents sets the foundation for our other relationships. If we always use an attitude of gratitude towards our parents, we'll nurture this habit, and we'll naturally appreciate other people's kindness and contributions. As a result, we will have good relationships with other people too. That's also fortune. 2: Respect The second field of fortune is respect. Respect is extremely important for relationships. Nobody likes a disrespectful, rude, or arrogant person. Lack of respect angers people and creates conflict. That's misfortune if not disaster. On the other hand, when we make others feel respected, they really appreciate it, and they will return respect to us. Having others' respect is a form of fortune. As Mencius said, "Those who love others are constantly loved by others. Those who respect others are constantly respected by others." Respect is especially important towards elders, meaning anyone in a higher position than us. It's the natural order of the world for juniors to respect elders. If we see an elder scolding a junior, that wouldn't seem strange, but if we seem a junior scolding an elder, we would think, "What a disrespectful junior!". This isn't to say that elders don't need to respect juniors, just that juniors especially need to respect elders. When we see elders, such as parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, teachers, and leaders, we should think about how to serve them. Moreover, respect is shown through carefulness. When we serve elders, we take the task very seriously and do it conscientiously. We should check the instructions carefully and report updates promptly. When elders see respectful juniors, they will cherish, value, and want to help such juniors. That is fortune for the junior. Teachers especially should be respected, not just because they teach us important knowledge and wisdom, but also because our level of respect determines our own benefit. A common saying in Buddhism goes, "One percent sincerity and respect reaps one percent benefit. Ten percent sincerity respect reaps ten percent benefit." If a student really respects the teacher and learning, what would they naturally do? They would pre-study before class, review after class, actively participate in class, and promptly ask questions. When the teacher speaks, the student would pay careful attention. All of this benefits the student. All the students in the class got the same lesson, but their level of benefit is dependent on their own level of respect. If we want to cultivate respect, then we can learn rules of etiquette. The spirit of etiquette is respect and consideration for others, which will create fortune for ourselves. I've previously written about etiquette in an article titled The Importance of Etiquette in Daily Life, so I won't elaborate here. 3: Compassion The third field of fortune is compassion. Compassion means giving others joy and relieving others' suffering. Someone with a heart of compassion has a service mindset. As Seneca said, "Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness." Those who always hold the intention to serve and give to others will in turn be helped by others, so giving creates fortune. According to karma, whatever we give, we will in turn receive. Buddhism often talks about three forms of giving: Giving others wealth reaps wealth Giving others comfort and safety reaps health Giving others knowledge and wisdom reaps wisdom Giving wealth: For example, in the process of helping our company earn revenue, we earn our salary. The more value we create for our company, the more salary we get. If we do not add value to our company, our company will not want to keep us as an employee. Another example is when we give gifts to others. Later, when a suitable time arises, they will naturally return a gift. Even if we don't have much material wealth, we can give our energy (non-material resource) to help others. When we use our time and energy to help others, others will naturally help us back. Giving comfort and safety: For example, when someone is in a low mood, we help to lift them up. In that process, we also lift our own mood, and we are less likely to sink into a low mood. If we help someone in their time of difficulty, others will help us in our time of difficulty. If we share health knowledge with others, we would also use the same knowledge in our lives. Giving knowledge and wisdom: When we teach or share knowledge, we ourselves are reviewing it. Teaching leaves a deeper impression in the teacher than in the student. When people with a compassionate heart see others unhappy or suffering, they won't turn a blind eye and think, "None of my business. Don't trouble me." They will do their best to help to whatever degree they can. In this way, they will have a clear conscience. And according to karma, when they themselves are in trouble, people won't turn a blind eye towards them. It's no wonder Laozi said, "View others gains as your own gains. View others' losses as your own losses." Icon Sources: Flaticon One important point is that compassion must be balanced with wisdom. If we lack wisdom, then even if we have good intentions, we may end up harming others. Consider these examples: Parents who spoil their children out of love end up ruining their children's virtues, which creates misfortune for their futures. If we see a homeless person on the street and want to help, it might be better to buy them a meal than give cash. If others ask us for a big favor, we need to weigh our ability and not take on more than we can handle. We also need to confirm the facts with relevant parties. When helping others, we need to consider the long-term. We want them to become independent rather than become reliant on our help. When helping others, we need to consider the impact on related parties. In the process of helping one person, we don't want to upset or burden other people. Conclusion Chances are, we probably all want to have more fortune. Fortune can appear as encountering good opportunities, receiving help from others, happiness, good health, intelligence, or just "getting lucky". The good news is that fortune can be accumulated, and it doesn't require any money or special circumstances. We can plant fortune in our daily lives through the fields of gratitude, respect, and compassion. How are your fields of fortune doing? How can you take better care of them? P.S. For more on karma and accumulating fortune, check out these two articles: Aspects of Karma: Big, Small, Shared, Individual The Impact of Hidden Goodness (and Sins) Weekly Wisdom #408

Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. Yanzi was known to be extremely wise and a master of propriety, etiquette, and rituals. One time, Yanzi went to the State of Lu (the state where Confucius lived) on a diplomatic mission, and Confucius instructed his students to go observe and learn from Yanzi. After Yanzi's meeting with the Duke of Lu finished, one of Confucius's students, Zi Gong returned. He asked Confucius, "How can anyone say Yanzi is a master of propriety? The ancient rituals state, 'When ascending steps, do not skip steps. When in the main hall, do not walk with hurried paces. When receiving a jade artifact, do not kneel.' Today, everything Yanzi did was completely opposite to this." (Pause: If you were Confucius, how would you respond?) Confucius replied, "I have a meeting with Yanzi later. I will ask him then." After finishing his official business with the Duke of Lu, Yanzi went to meet with Confucius. During their meeting, Confucius asked, "The ancient rituals state, 'When ascending steps, do not skip steps. When in the main hall, do not walk with hurried paces. When receiving a jade artifact, do not kneel.' I heard that what you did today was contrary to this?" (Pause: If you were Yanzi, how would you respond?) Yanzi replied, "I have heard that between the two main pillars of the hall, the ruler and the minister each have their fixed positions. When the ruler takes one step, the minister takes two steps. Because the Duke of Lu ascended the steps very rapidly, I was worried that I wouldn't make it in time. That is why I skipped steps to ascend and hurried through the court hall—simply so I could get into position on time. Furthermore, because the Duke held the jade artifact too low when presenting it to me, I had no choice but to kneel down in order to properly accept it. Besides, I have also heard that in life and work, as long as one can grasp the major principles, it does not matter if there are minor variations in the small details." Afterwards, Yanzi paid his respects and took his leave, and Confucius saw him off with the etiquette reserved for an honored guest. Upon returning, Confucius said to his students: "The value of propriety lies in adapting to the timing and circumstances. Faced with such unconventional situations like these, only Yanzi could act with such perfect measure and degree!" Image Source: GPT Commentary This story has many learnings from many perspectives: Zi Gong's perspective on propriety Yanzi's attitude towards the Duke of Lu Confucius's attitude towards Yanzi 1: Zi Gong's perspective on propriety Zi Gong felt that Yanzi violated the ancient rituals. That's because his interpretation of the rituals ended at the matter and not at the underlying principle and reasoning. The rituals state, "When ascending steps, do not skip steps. When in the main hall, do not walk with hurried paces. When receiving a jade artifact, do not kneel." These are matters. But all matters have exceptions, and in order to judge when to make exceptions, we have to understand the reasoning behind the matters. Why should we not skip steps when ascending stairs? Because skipping steps reflects a rushed, agitated state of mind, and it is not dignified. When an ambassador meets with a ruler, both sides should have a very respectful, calm, and dignified manner. Why should we not walk in a hurried manner in the main hall? Same reason as before. Why should we not kneel when receiving a jade artifact? A jade artifact is very precious and expensive, so we want to be in a position of good balance when receiving it. We want to prevent accidently dropping it. Is our balance better when standing or when kneeling? Of course when standing. Why did Yanzi rush up the stairs and through the main hall? Because the Duke of Lu rushed, and in order to show his respect to the Duke, he has to arrive in his position on time, or else the Duke might think Yanzi is impolite. We have to remember that Yanzi represents his entire state (the State of Qi). Thus, it's very important that he does not upset the Duke of Lu. Zi Gong only focused on the matters of ritual, and he neglected that the goal of these rituals is to create harmony and mutual respect between the ruler and the guest. Yanzi focused on the goal of ritual, so he exercised proper judgment in adjusting the matters. On a related note, some people break the rules for their own convenience and make the excuse that there's no need to be such a stickler to rules. This attitude is not one of respect and should not be allowed. 2: Yanzi's attitude towards the Duke of Lu One of the most admirable qualities of Yanzi is that he does not demand others to be right. Instead, he adjusts himself to others. So many of our relationship conflicts arise because we demand others to be different rather than being willing to adjust ourselves to others. For whatever reason, the Duke of Lu didn't know or didn't abide by the ancient rituals. Yanzi didn't get annoyed at the Duke. He didn't insist on following the rituals and then later criticize the Duke for breaking the rituals. He was willing to adapt himself and "break" the rituals with the Duke. In this way, harmony and mutual respect was achieved. Making such adaptations requires wisdom and proper judgment. In this case, the Duke is in a higher position, and the setting is in the Duke's court. According to other rules of propriety, those in lower positions should yield to those in higher positions, and guests should follow the rules of the host. Therefore, even if the Duke rushes up the stairs and halls, the Duke is still "right", and Yanzi ought to follow. But if the Duke of Lu visited the Duke of Qi in the State of Qi, then the Duke of Lu should follow the rules and example set by the Duke of Qi. Relating back to ourselves, if we want to have harmony and mutual respect with others, then we need to harmonize ourselves with them first, not demand them to listen to us. We need to respect them first, not demand them to respect us first. If we treat others with the same attitude that Yanzi treated the Duke of Lu, we'd naturally have harmony. If we view others as below us, then we might be controlling and demanding, resulting in others opposing us. If we view others as the same level as us, we might debate and argue with them, and others will still oppose us. But if we are truly humble, we'll view others as above us, and we'll adapt ourselves to them. Then we'll have harmony. That's the attitude Yanzi had towards the Duke. 3: Confucius's attitude towards Yanzi When Zi Gong reported that Yanzi seemed to have violated the ancient rituals, Confucius didn't jump to conclusions. He told Zi Gong that he would check with Yanzi first. This may seem like an obvious thing to do, but people often don't do it. How often do people just jump to conclusions? Have you ever been falsely accused? Have you ever wrongly accused others? Being confident that we are right is a common problem. To guard against this vice, we need to cultivate humility and carefulness. Given that Confucius told his students to learn from Yanzi, it's clear that Confucius respects and approves of Yanzi. When Zi Gong doubted Yanzi's sense of propriety, he shouldn't assume he's right. He could assume that there's something he's not understanding. If he had that kind of attitude, he might have stayed behind to ask Yanzi personally why Yanzi did what he did. Perhaps it was inconvenient for him to personally ask Yanzi, so Zi Gong went back to Confucius first. But from the way he asked Confucius, it seemed like Zi Gong believed Yanzi was wrong. If he were more humble, he might've phrased his question differently: "Today I saw Yanzi do this and that. I remember the ancient rituals said this and that. Is it just me, or did Yanzi seem to violate the ancient rituals? Could you explain to me, master?" Similarly, when we think others did something wrong, if we firmly believe our perspective is true even though we didn't check with them, then we might create conflict and resentment. If we want to maintain harmony and mutual respect, then we should use a humble attitude and check if they have their reasons for doing what they did (most likely they do!). When we give them respect and understanding first, they will be more open to hearing our suggestions. Conclusion When it comes to rules and etiquette, it's not enough to just know the matters. We have to grasp the underlying principle and reasoning behind the matters. Only then can we make proper judgment on when to adjust or make exceptions. When it comes to relationship harmony, the most important thing is that we harmonize with others by adapting to others. If we instead demand others to harmonize and adapt to us, that's a recipe for conflict. Whenever we think others are wrong or hear news of others' wrong, we shouldn't jump to conclusions. It's important to confirm with the person. This is cultivating our respect and humility. Weekly Wisdom #407

The Daily Stoic is a book with 366 quotes from Stoic philosophers on how to live a good life. I had previously read this a couple years ago and benefited a lot from it, and I've decided to read it again this year. Every day, I read the quote, the explanation, and then journal my thoughts and reflections. At the end of each month, I review my reflections and summarize the month. The theme for July is "duty", and this article will summarize my July reflections: Our most fundamental duty Duty in relationships Duty in work Joy of duty fulfillment Image Source: GPT 1: Our most fundamental duty A lot of us spend a lot of energy trying to manage and control other people or the outer environment. We want others to change. We want our situation to change. But a lot of us neglect something important: our first and most fundamental duty is to manage ourselves. After all, who is responsible for me? I am. I choose all my decisions, and I have to bear the full consequences of all my decisions. Who is responsible for other people? They are. They choose their decisions, and they have to bear the full consequences of their decisions. If we neglect managing ourselves and instead always focus on managing others, then not only are we overstepping our authority, we are also deluded, and our efforts will not yield good results. July 1: "Whatever anyone does or says, for my part, I'm bound to the good. In the same way an emerald or gold or purple might always proclaim: 'whatever anyone does or says, I must be what I am and show my true colors." —Marcus Aurelius Philosophy emphasizes self-cultivation. Cultivation means correcting our faults and building our own virtues. Philosophers view self-cultivation and being a good person as the most fundamental duty. Regardless if others are good or not, I will be good, for that is my duty as a philosopher. Moreover, how others treat me is a direct result of how I treat others. When I manage myself better, when I cultivate my virtues and eliminate my vices, others will naturally respond to me in more positive ways. Therefore, self-cultivation is actually the root of changing the outside world. Cultivating ourselves not only benefits ourselves, it also benefits others by showing them a good example, and it benefits the world by adding more goodness to the world. July 3: "The task of a philosopher: we should bring our will into harmony with whatever happens, so that nothing happens against our will and nothing that we wish for fails to happen." —Epictetus "Stuck in traffic? A few wonderful minutes to relax and sit. Your car broke down after idling for so long? Ah, what a nice nudge to take a long walk the rest of the way. A swerving car driven by a distracted, cell-phone-wielding idiot nearly hit you as you were walking and soaked you head to toe with muddy water? What a reminder about how precarious our existence is and how silly it is to get upset about something as trivial as being late or having trouble with your commute!" —Ryan Holiday When it comes to self-cultivation, there are three aspects: action, speech, and mind. Cultivating the mind is the root, for it is our mind that determines our action and speech. We should constantly remind ourselves that outside situations and people cannot force me to feel anything. Whether I feel upset or at peace is completely dependent on my own mind. The philosopher uses every situation to cultivate virtues such as calmness, harmony, and adaptability. If we can improve the situation, then we give our full effort. If we cannot change the situation, then we accept it with calm and grace. Either way, we improve our virtues from it. If we can have this kind of attitude, then all people are good people, and all matters are good matters. This is encompassed by the Stoic phrase “Amor Fati”. Image Source July 5: "Good people will do what they find honorable to do, even if it requires hard work; they'll do it even if it causes them injury; they'll do it even if it will bring danger. Again, they won't do what they find base, even if it brings wealth, pleasure, or power. Nothing will deter them from what is honorable, and nothing will lure them into what is base." —Seneca The Stoics assert that everyone has an inner conscience and a sense of right and wrong. As Musonius Rufus said, “The human being is born with an inclination toward virtue.” However, some people’s selfish desires and bad habits are extremely strong and cover up their sense of morality. Even so, that inner conscience is always there and can be awakened when they see moral exemplars. Philosophers hold firm to their inner conscience and follow it. They do what is honorable, even if it requires hard work or is dangerous. They won’t violate their integrity for things like wealth, pleasure, or power. Having a clear conscience is also a form of joy. It gives us peace of mind. For example, if we see someone in need of help, and we have the ability to help them, what do we think? If we think, “But it’s such a hassle…”, then that’s selfishness, and we may have a guilty conscience later. The philosopher would do their best to help to the best of their ability, even if it’s a hassle. To give another example, other people might break the rules or even the law in order to gain self-benefit. They might pressure us to do the same and call us stupid otherwise. But the philosopher would choose to follow their sense of moral rightness rather than succumb to peer pressure. To give one more example, if our ruler or leader wants to do something immoral, do we urge them against it? If we go against the leader’s wishes, that might attract danger for us. Non-virtuous people would try to please the leader without regard for morality; they want to get the leader’s favor because it benefits themselves. The philosopher would do what’s morally right and urge the leader to follow morality. Moreover, they would advise with respect, tact, and patience. Philosophers have the welfare of the leader and all the people in their heart. Even if the leader might get upset and demote them or cause trouble for them, they choose to do the morally just thing. Seneca’s words here remind me of a quote from Mencius: "I seek life. I also seek moral rightness. If I cannot have both, then I would forsake life and gain moral rightness." (Original text: 生，亦我所欲也；義，亦我所欲也。二者不可得兼，舍生而取義者也。) In other words, Mencius would rather die following morality than to live violating morality. Such is also the spirit of a Stoic philosopher. My Practice Managing myself first The idea that we should manage ourselves first, not others, is easy to understand, but much more difficult to consistently practice. I didn’t learn philosophy until after I graduated university, so I already nurtured the habit of blaming other people and the outside world. Changing this habit takes time and determination. Every day, I keep a merit-fault journal, and one item I reflect on is Amor Fati, or reframing negative situations into positive ones. I still have the habit of getting annoyed or worried when things don’t go according to my wishes. As a beginner cultivator, it’s impossible to stop these thoughts from arising, and that’s fine. The mental work of philosophy is to not let these negative thoughts perpetuate, but instead use proper or positive thinking to overcome them. For example, in the past, when I saw speeding or breaking the rules, I would get upset at them. Now, when these thoughts arise, I bring out proper thoughts. For example, other people speed because lots of people speed, so they don’t think it’s wrong or breaking the rules. They’re not purposely trying to be bad. Besides, what they do is their matter. How I respond is my matter. They cannot force me to get upset. The cause of my annoyance is my own intolerance, not their behavior. Criticizing them harms my own virtues. Instead, I should use their behavior as motivation for me to set a good example. In this way, I cultivate my tolerance and contribute goodness to society. To give another example, I recently went to visit my dad and grandma in China, and my dad didn’t prepare our room. The room was full of delivery packages. Even the bed was full of delivery boxes. My mom and I arrived late at night, and I was quite tired. My first thought was, “Are you serious? How am I going to sleep?” But I caught myself complaining, and I immediately changed my thinking. “The situation cannot force me to feel upset. I choose my feelings. My grandma already warned me in advance that the room was messy, so I really shouldn’t be surprised. I know that my dad is kind of a messy person. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and we should tolerate each other’s weaknesses. All I have to do is move some delivery boxes off the bed and onto the floor, then I can sleep. It’s really not a big deal.” So I spent five minutes or so to move delivery boxes from the bed to the floor, and then I could sleep. I also felt very happy that I was able to harmonize my mind with the situation. In the past, I would’ve complained a lot. But this time, I actually enjoyed the challenge. It elevated my virtues of tolerance and harmony. Throughout my couple of weeks there, my mother and I helped organize the room a bit, but we weren’t annoyed or rushed. My dad is the head of the house there, and we respect his habits and preferences. We’re not going to stand above him and criticize him for being messy. His standard of cleanliness is different from ours, and we shouldn’t demand others to have the same standards as us. Our respect for him allowed us to get along very harmoniously. Abiding by Moral Conscience As for abiding by moral conscience, this is something I care a lot about. Before I learned philosophy, I would do immoral things like shout at my parents, use work time to do personal matters, or idle time away with TV and games when I could be doing more important things. Afterwards, I would feel a bit uneasy deep down, but it wasn’t top of mind because my mind was distracted by other things. After learning and practicing the teachings of past philosophers and sages, I feel a sense of spiritual wellness and richness. I have peace of mind. It’s like Mencius said, “Feeling no reason for shame when looking up at the Heavens or towards people,” this is a joy. Following morality even when it might cause us harm is a higher level of cultivation. Oftentimes, this “harm” isn’t physical harm, but rather harm to our image and reputation. It’s easy to do good when we think others will praise us for it. But what if others disapprove? Can we still remain resolved to be good? One example in my experience is advising others when they have a fault. Here, I’m referring to people who are not that close to us, such as colleagues, leaders, and even friends. If we advise them, they might take it in the wrong way and get upset at us and think of us negatively. There’s a risk of harming the relationship or creating awkwardness in the relationship. They might even get upset at us and cause trouble for us. In the past, I might have thought, “Whatever. They suffer the consequences of their own shortcomings, not me. I’m not going to go through the trouble of advising them and risking them getting upset.” But if we can help others and don’t bother, that violates our inner conscience. Moreover, the golden rule teaches us to treat others the way we’d want to be treated. If I had a fault that’s harmful to me, what would I want others to do? I would want them to advise me in a kind and respectful manner. Therefore, I should do that for others. Once I set my attitude right, I would then be willing to put in the effort to rehearse how I would advise them and patiently wait for a suitable time. In my experience, the other person is usually quite appreciative. Even if they’re not very appreciative, as long as I did my best to be respectful and kind, then I have peace of mind. I also imagine that they might have a sensitive ego in the moment, but in the future after they calm down, they will realize my kind intentions and that my words might have some truth to them, and they would be appreciative. 2: Duty in human relationships July 7: "This is what you should teach me, how to be like Odysseus—how to love my country, wife and father, and how, even after suffering shipwreck, I might keep sailing on course to those honorable ends." —Seneca Philosophy is a moral education, and it is inseparable from relationships. Why do we cultivate ourselves? To have better relationships. Happy relationships is one of the main sources of happiness in life. If we improve ourselves yet our relationships don’t improve, then that’s not real cultivation. In this quote, Seneca mentions some important roles and relationships we all have. As children, we ought to love our parents. As a spouse, we ought to love our spouse. As a citizen, we ought to love our country. After all, these people have given a lot of kindness to us, so it’s only moral that we show kindness to them too. Yet how many people have actually learned about proper behavior in different relationships? Confucianism talks a lot more about the different roles people play and the moral duties of each role. Mencius said, “Between parent and child, there is affection. Between leader and follower, there is moral rightness. Between spouses, there are separate responsibilities. Between elders and juniors, there is proper order. Between friends, there is good faith.” (Original Text: 父子有親，君臣有義，夫婦有別，長幼有序，朋友有信。) Image Source: GPT The Record on Ritual goes into even more detail: “What is meant by moral duty in human relationships? Parents being compassionate, children being filial, elder siblings being nice, younger siblings being deferential, husbands being righteous, wives being amenable, elders being kind, juniors being obliging, rulers being virtuous, ministers being devoted. These ten things are what is meant by moral duty in human relationships.” (Original Text:《禮運》曰：「何謂人義？父慈，子孝，兄良，弟弟，夫義，婦聽，長惠，幼順，君仁，臣忠，十者謂之人義。」) Image Source: GPT I won’t elaborate on all ten, but I’ll touch a few of the most important ones. We all start out as children, and as children, it is our moral duty to be filial, which means loving and respecting our parents. More concretely, that involves nurturing our parents’ physical health, emotional health, wisdom, and aspirations. The biggest thing is to listen to our parents. That doesn’t necessarily mean we have to do everything they tell us to, but it does mean making them feel heard and communicating with them patiently and with an attitude of love and respect. Our love and respect for parents serves as the foundation for all our other relationships. When we love our parents, we will naturally love our siblings because harmony among siblings makes parents happy. When we respect parents, we will naturally respect elders outside the family, such as teachers and leaders. When we get along harmoniously with siblings, we will naturally get along with peers outside the family, such as classmates, friends, and colleagues. Next, most people get married. As a spouse, it is important to have separate responsibilities. There is deep wisdom behind this. The Record on Ritual states: "Husband and wife must have distinct responsibilities, then they will have moral gratitude towards each other. When spouses have moral gratitude towards each other, then parents will have a loving relationship with children. When parents and children have love, then the relationship between leaders and followers will be upright. Thus, it is said that marriage ceremony is the foundational ceremony." (Original text: 《禮記·昏義》：「男女有別，而後夫婦有義；夫婦有義，而後父子有親；父子有親，而後君臣有正。故曰：昏禮者，禮之本也。」 This quote teaches us that harmonious spouses are the foundation for a peaceful society. When spouses have separate responsibilities, they will be grateful to each other for their contributions to the family. When spouses think of each other’s contributions and kindness, they will naturally get along well. When spouses have harmony, they will have positive energy and love towards their children. When parents give their children enough love, children will naturally have love and respect in their hearts, and they will grow up with healthy personalities. It all starts with spouses having mutual appreciation for each other’s contributions. As citizens of the country, we receive a lot of kindness from the country. The land we are on nurtures our life and protects us. It’s thanks to our country that we have all our daily needs, that we have safety in daily life, that we can get an education, that we have employment opportunities, and so much more. It would be ungrateful and unreasonable to take all these things for granted. When we are grateful for our country, we would naturally want to give back to our country—by contributing our time and energy into useful work that benefits the people. July 20: “The nature of the universe made rational creatures for the sake of each other, with an eye toward mutual benefit based on true value and never for harm.” —Marcus Aurelius July 21: "Whenever you have trouble getting up in the morning, remind yourself that you've been made by nature for the purpose of working with others, whereas even unthinking animals share sleeping. And it's our own natural purpose that is more fitting and more satisfying." —Marcus Aurelius The human brain is wired for kindness and cooperation. When we do good and help others, we naturally feel good inside. We don’t need a reason to do good. Doing good nurtures our peace of mind, while violating morality harms it. Having a sense of moral duty to serve and help other people is also a great source of motivation. Since we live in an interdependent world, everything we do (or don’t do) affects others. If we sleep in, that affects others. If we slack off, that affects others. The stronger our sense of moral duty, the stronger our discipline and conscientiousness. July 19: "As Plato said, every soul is deprived of truth against its will. The same holds true for justice, self-control, goodwill to others, and every similar virtue. It's essential to constantly keep this in your mind, for it will make you more gentle to all." —Marcus Aurelius A key principle to remember in all relationships is to be tolerant with others and strict with ourselves. When we understand others, we’d naturally be more tolerant and gentler towards them. Plato reminds us that no one willingly tries to be stupid or wrong or bad. Everyone prefers to be good, right, and liked. People do what they do because they think it’s right, or because they feel like they don’t have any other choice. When we understand this, we would naturally be more tolerant towards others. Then we can advise with an attitude of kindness and respect rather than criticize. July 15: "When you've done well and another has benefited by it, why like a fool do you look for a third thing on top—credit for the good deed or a favor in return?" —Marcus Aurelius The thing with duty is that it’s what we’re supposed to do. If we truly view doing good as our duty, we wouldn’t go around seeking praise for our good deeds. Imagine after you used the washroom, you go to wash your hands. Then a bystander starts applauding and says, “Wow, you washed your hands after using the bathroom! Amazing!” Wouldn’t you think that’s kind of strange? Washing your hands is simply what you’re supposed to do. Similarly, being good and contributing to relationships is simply our moral duty. We shouldn’t do good on the condition that others notice and praise us. That would be having impure intentions. For example, maybe we notice the house has been messy for a while, and we really want our spouse to clean up, but they don’t. So we decide to clean up half, and then we say, “Did you notice that the house is cleaner now?” The spouse says, “Oh OK.” We then get angry and say, “I cleaned the house and you don’t even appreciate it? You should help me finish the cleaning!” That would be demanding recognition and return favor for doing good. Because our intentions are impure, it leads to impure results. In this case, the spouse might get defensive and say, “No one forced you to go clean. I’m too busy recently, and besides, I don’t like cleaning. If you want to clean, be my guest, but don’t force me to do it.” From this example, we can see that when we want something in return for doing good deeds, it will often backfire on us. People dislike it when someone pretends to do good, but they actually have ulterior motives. Therefore, we should do good and contribute to relationships with sincerity and gratitude, not seeking anything in return. In this way, we will gain the joy of helping others and the peace of mind that comes from being moral. My Practice Before I learned philosophy, I was quite self-centered. All my thinking revolved around me, what I wanted, and what’s in it for me. After learning philosophy, I became more others-centered. I started paying more attention to other people, what they want, and how I can contribute to others. After all, the quality of our life depends on the quality of our relationships, so helping others is helping ourselves. Thanks to the teachings of Confucianism, I improved my relationship with my parents. After I could better understand and appreciate my parents, I naturally got along better with other people in other relationships. I used to judge others when they did things that I deemed illogical. But after learning philosophy, I started cultivating tolerance. I frequently reminded myself that everyone has their reasons for doing what they do. I don’t like it when others jump to conclusions and misunderstand me, so I shouldn’t jump to conclusions and deem others as unreasonable before understanding them. If I truly understand them, I wouldn’t think they are unreasonable. In terms of doing good without wanting anything in return, I’m usually OK at this. I know that when people give praise, they tend to praise excessively, so I’m quite apprehensive about receiving praise. I know that arrogance leads to downfall, and only the humble can continue to grow. 3: Duty in Work July 10: "Love the humble art you have learned, and take rest in it. Pass through the remainder of your days as one who whole-heartedly entrusts all possessions to the gods, making yourself neither a tyrant nor a slave to any person." —Marcus Aurelius We spend a majority of our life working. Therefore, if we want a happy life, it’s important to enjoy our work. Some of us are fortunate to know what our passion is and be able to do it for work. Many others aren’t sure what they’re passionate about or what their life purpose should be. I’ve previously written about how to find a meaningful purpose, so I won’t elaborate here. The key point is this: do something that helps other people. As mentioned earlier, we live in an interdependent society. We receive the contributions of countless people in our daily lives, so it is our moral duty to give back and contribute to the world. When we clearly feel that what we do is of service to others and to the world, we will find it meaningful and rewarding. Even if we’re not good at that work to begin with, if we enjoy it, we will eventually get good at it. Moreover, we can always find meaning in whatever it is we are doing now. People can have the same job yet feel different about it based on their attitude. For example, a janitor at a hospital could feel like their work is mundane and unimportant, or they could think about how they are working to give their family a better future, and they are contributing a clean environment to the hospital, which serves thousands of people in the community. By keeping the environment clean, staff and patients have a happier mood, and disease is prevented from spreading. Same job, different attitude, different feeling. When we consciously choose what we do and find meaning in it, then we are not a slave. When Marcus Aurelius says “whole-heartedly entrust all possessions to the gods”, I interpret it as “dedicate yourself to the wellbeing of all people and the world” because the gods want all people to live happy and productive lives. If you don’t believe in gods, then simply replace the word “gods” with “world”. When we dedicate ourselves to serving the world (instead of only serving ourselves), we are not a tyrant, and the world will take care of us in return. July 25: "When you see someone often flashing their rank or position, or someone whose name is often bandied about in public, don't be envious; such things are bought at the expense of life… Some die on the first rungs of the ladder of success, others before they can reach the top, and the few that make it to the top of their ambition through a thousand indignities realize at the end it's only for an inscription on their gravestone." —Seneca A lot of people become attached to reputation and wealth in career. They work to satisfy their own desires. However, desires have no limits, especially when we always see others with more. Such people are always striving for higher positions and more wealth, always trying to be above others. Seneca is urging us to think carefully about chasing this definition of “success”, for it will cost us our life, not only in the sense that our time will be gone, but those years will be spent living in frustration, craving, struggle, and toil. If you talk to people near the end of their life, no one says they wish they had spent more time working, earning money, or chasing reputation. Instead, they wish they had spent more time with loved ones and more time doing things that they enjoyed. Oftentimes, workaholics use work as a distraction or excuse from facing their inner emptiness or other problems in life. That’s not an effective solution. Learning about morality and fulfilling our moral duties is the solution. The Classic of Filial Piety says, “To not love one’s family yet love others violates morality.” Family is the foundation for every individual. If a person has career success, but their family life is full of conflict, can that person truly be happy? Can that person have inner peace? A proper attitude towards work and career is one of service and duty. We work to support our family and to give back to society. This kind of attitude will bring us joy. Given that we work to support our family, family should come before work. Work should not be an excuse to neglect our family members. For example, if our family members complain that we’re too busy with work, we shouldn’t say “Well I’m working to earn money for the family!” The real problem is that they feel like we don’t care enough about them. Our attitude reflects in our actions and how we spend our time. The solution isn’t necessarily working less. We just have to cherish our time with family. For example, when we get home, do we give our family members quality time? Or do we just sit on the couch and scroll on our phones? When we tell our family that we have to work overtime, do we do it with an apologetic tone of voice, or do we take it for granted that they should support us working overtime? To love work yet not love one’s family violates morality, and when morality is violated, both external and internal conflict will arise. My Practice I did my undergrad in business administration, and after I graduated, I was working in business. However, I felt like helping people make money wasn’t fulfilling to me. I wanted to do something more meaningful. Later, I ended up transitioning into teaching. Although the pay was less, I felt my work was much more fulfilling. I taught courses like business leadership and health, and I felt that what I was teaching was truly benefiting people’s lives. I really enjoyed lesson prepping and teaching these courses. I would happily work overtime. Before learning philosophy, I used to prioritize work over family. Career development was my top priority. After graduating, I lived at home with my mom, and there were times when my mom complained that I never think to help around the house. I would then argue that she didn’t communicate with me that she wanted me to do certain things around the house, otherwise, I would have done them. Then she would argue that I’m too busy so she never has the time to tell me. Then I would argue that she can tell me any time I am at home. Looking back, the problem wasn’t the matter. The problem was my attitude. Her words were a reflection of her inner dissatisfaction towards me not caring enough about the family. Not doing certain chores around the house was just one matter that reflected my attitude. If I truly cared more about the family, I would take initiative to do work around the house. I would also cherish my time at home more. After learning philosophy (I started with Confucianism), I understood that prioritizing work over family violates morality, which would lead to relationship conflicts and inner guilt. Once my attitude shifted, everything got better. There were times when I could have taken on more work opportunities, but I rejected them because my mother felt I was already too busy. The harmony I gained at home is worth much more than salary or career advancement. 4: Joy of Duty Fulfillment The word “duty” can sound like a burden or a heavy responsibility, but fulfilling our moral duty actually nourishes our mind and spirit. In other words, fulfilling our moral duties brings joy! July 11: "But what does Socrates say? 'Just as one person delights in improving his farm, and another his horse, so I delight in attending to my own improvement day by day.'" —Epictetus As mentioned before, our most fundamental duty is to manage ourselves, to cultivate our virtues, to correct our faults, and to be a good person. This takes effort, but as Socrates says, it is delightful. It’s human nature to delight in our own improvement. When we cultivate virtues like kindness, calmness, and humility, we’ll feel more happiness, peace of mind, and gratitude. Isn’t that what everyone seeks? If we don’t cultivate ourselves, if we don’t eliminate vices like selfishness, anger, and arrogance, then we’ll continue encountering problems and suffering. Isn’t that what we’re all trying to avoid? Cultivation is certainly not easy. Overcoming bad habits and building virtues requires effort and persistence. It’s like farming. We have to tend to the crop every day. Some days it’s really hot working in the fields. Some days severe weather can damage the crop. Although it’s difficult, if we don’t tend to the crop, we won’t have a harvest to reap. If we don’t cultivate ourselves, we won’t have happiness to reap. Although cultivation requires hard work, we have to remember that the reward is worth it. July 30: "Trust me, real joy is a serious thing. Do you think someone can, in the charming expression, blithely dismiss death with an easy disposition? Or swing open the door to poverty, keep pleasures in check, or meditate on the endurance of suffering? The one who is comfortable with turning these thoughts over is truly full of joy, but hardly cheerful. It's exactly such a joy that I would wish for you to possess, for it will never run dry once you've laid claim to its source." —Seneca "Can you be fully content with your life, can you bravely face what life has in store from one day to the next, can you bounce back from every kind of adversity without losing a step, can you be a source of strength and inspiration to others around you? That's Stoic joy—the joy that comes from purpose, excellence, and duty. It's a serious thing—far more serious than a smile or a chipper voice." —Ryan Holiday Nowadays, a lot of people seek sensory stimulation as joy. People look for joy in delicious food, exciting experiences, shopping, video games, TV shows, even drugs. These are just temporary pleasures that lead to craving afterwards. People seek these temporary pleasures because they have a feeling of unease or emptiness inside, and they don’t know how to deal with it. Philosophy teaches us that outer things cannot solve inner problems. True joy is a sense of inner peace, strength, contentment, and confidence. It is not dependent on external circumstances. This is the type of joy we get from practicing philosophy. Icon Sources: Flaticon Philosophers encounter the same situations as everyone else, but they cultivate their mind to respond more wisely and effectively. The first example Seneca gave is death. Death is one of the greatest fears for people, and its often a taboo subject. Normal people just avoid thinking about it. When death knocks on their door, they become frantic and frightened. Stoics face death head on and accept it as a reality of life, and they use it as motivation to cherish time, cherish life, and not fuss about the small things. When death eventually knocks, Stoics have peace of mind and no regrets. Another example is suffering and adversity. Most people dislike discomfort and hardship. Stoics don’t purposely seek suffering. However, they recognize that hardship and suffering is inevitable in life, and complaining about it doesn’t help. Instead of wishing suffering doesn’t come, they focus on what’s in their control: improving their own virtues to make these adversities bearable and to grow from these adversities. If a person is not afraid of death and hardship, then what could disturb them? Philosophers also train their mind in good times to guard against indulgence and laziness. They know that neither bad times nor good times will last forever. In bad times, we have the awareness and vigilance to cultivate ourselves. In good times, it’s easy to fall into indulgence and laziness. If that happens, our virtues and strength of mind will degrade, and when adversity comes in the future, we’ll be in trouble. Thus, it is extremely important to maintain vigilance and diligence in good times. My Practice Before learning philosophy, I used to seek external stimulations like gaming, TV, shopping, food, travel, etc. If you forced me to sit in a room quietly for thirty minutes, I’d feel restless. After learning philosophy, I learned to seek inner joy and peace of mind instead of external stimulation. I learned there are four main types of inner joy: Good relationships Clear conscience Helping others/meaningful purpose Self-improvement Icon Sources: Flaticon By learning and practicing teachings from ancient philosophers and sages, I gradually gained more inner joy and peace, and I naturally stopped craving external stimulation. I also experience negative emotions a lot less frequently and to lesser degrees. I still encounter problems often, and sometimes these problems can be quite big, but because I use philosophical teachings to guide my thinking, I’m better able to handle problems and grow from them. Not fearing problems and difficulties is another form of joy and inner peace. Looking back, the biggest leaps in cultivation usually come from overcoming big difficulties. Conclusion July was all about duty. Our first and most fundamental duty is to manage ourselves, not others. When we cultivate our virtues and correct our vices, the people and world around us will naturally change for the better. Secondly, we all have moral duties in our various relationships as children, siblings, spouses, parents, leaders, and followers. Third, we have a moral duty in our work and career to support our family and give back to society. Finally, fulfilling our moral duty nourishes our mind and spirit, while lack thereof leads to conflict and unease. What moral duties do you have? How well are you fulfilling them? Weekly Wisdom #406

Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. One day, Duke Jing was drinking wine, and one of his ministers, Tian Huanzi, was attending by his side. After a while, Tian Huanzi saw Yanzi approaching from a distance and reported to Duke Jing, "Please penalize Yanzi by making him drink wine." Perplexed, Duke Jing asked, "What is the reason for your request?" Huanzi replied, "Your Highness, look at Yanzi. He wears cheap cloth and a coarse deer-pelt coat, and he rides to court in a worn-out cart drawn by an inferior horse. This is hiding the bountiful rewards Your Highness has bestowed upon him." (Pause: If you were Duke Jing, how would you respond?) Hearing this, Duke Jing found it reasonable and sighed, "Indeed!" Therefore, after Yanzi paid his respects to Duke Jing and took his seat, the wine-pourer presented a cup to him and said, "The Duke penalizes you to drink." Image Source: Gemini Surprised, Yanzi asked, "May I ask the reason?" Huanzi spoke up, "The Duke granted you the rank of a high minister to honor your status, and gave you a million coins to enrich your household. Among all the ministers, none holds a title more noble than yours, and none receives a stipend more generous than yours. Yet, you wear cloth garments and a deer-pelt coat, and ride to court in a worn-out cart and an inferior horse. This is hiding the Duke's kindness from the public. Therefore, you must be penalized with a drink." (Pause: If you were Yanzi, how would you respond?) Upon hearing this, Yanzi left his mat, stood up, and addressed Duke Jing: "Should your humble servant drink this penalty wine first and then explain, or explain first and then drink?" Duke Jing replied, "Explain first, then drink the penalty wine." Yanzi said: "Your Highness granted me the rank of a high minister to honor me, but I, Yan Ying, dare not accept this appointment for the sake of personal nobility; I accept it to carry out your commands. Your Highness granted me a million coins to enrich my household, but I dare not accept this wealth for personal gain; I accept it so that your benevolence may reach more people, thereby showcasing your kindness. I have heard that if the wise rulers of the past knew that a minister received a generous salary but failed to care for his impoverished relatives, they would reprimand him. If they knew a minister held office but failed to fulfill his responsibilities, they would reprimand him. If the ruler's close relatives or my own paternal elders and brothers are left scattered and neglected in the wild, that is my fault. If the ruler’s distant relatives or my own acquaintances are left displaced and wandering, that is my fault. If our armor is weak and our war chariots are flimsy, that too is my fault. But as for riding to court in a worn-out cart and an inferior horse, I believe this is truly not my fault. Furthermore, because of your generosity towards me, among my paternal relatives, there is none who does not ride in a carriage; among my maternal relatives, there is none who lacks food or clothing; among my wife's relatives, there is none who suffers from hunger or cold. In addition, there are hundreds of poor scholars throughout the state who rely on my assistance to survive. In a situation like this, am I hiding the ruler's kindness, or am I showcasing it?" Hearing this, Duke Jing was deeply moved and exclaimed, "Excellent! In that case, let us penalize Huanzi with a cup on my behalf!" (Story Source) Commentary Lao Zi said, "I have three treasures that I constantly hold firmly to: first is compassion, second is frugality, and third is not presuming to be at the head of the world. Compassion enables courage. Frugality enables broadness. Not presuming to be at the head of the world enables talent." Yanzi's role modeling showcases all three virtues. Firstly, he has a lot of compassion for others. He can't bear to see people impoverished, lacking food or clothing, which is why he does his best to help these people, starting with those closest to him (i.e., his relatives), then extending out to people in society (i.e., poor scholars). When the ruler criticized and wanted to punish him, he had no fear because he knew what he did was morally right. He could courageously explain to the ruler his reasoning. Thus, compassion enables courage. Second, he was very frugal. He wore clothes to keep warm, not to show off. He rode a carriage simply for transportation, not to show off. He focused on functionality, not extravagance. He was frugal not to save money for himself, but to save money to help more and more people. Thus, frugality enables broadness of heart. Third, he was very humble. When the ruler ordered him to drink wine as punishment, he didn't immediately argue back and say, "But I didn't do anything wrong!" Instead, he respectfully asked Duke Jing, "Should your humble servant drink this penalty wine first and then explain, or explain first and then drink?" Since Duke Jing felt respected, he would be more open to hearing Yanzi's explanation. Although Yanzi himself didn't really want to accept so much wealth and rank from the ruler, he still obeyed the ruler, and he used it to help the public. After explaining himself, Yanzi didn't say, "So you see, clearly, I am not hiding the kindness of the ruler. I am showcasing it!" He said, "In a situation like this, am I hiding the ruler's kindness, or am I showcasing it?" He was never arrogant, thinking himself to be definitely right, or thinking himself equal to his ruler. He always maintained a humble attitude. It's surely because of his humility that he could learn and cultivate such a virtuous character. Moreover, when others see his great role modeling, they would be inspired too. Thus, humility enables talent for both oneself and others. Although we might not be ministers receiving a generous salary from a ruler, we might receive generous gifts from others. In such a situation, how would you respond? I imagine Yanzi would act according to rules of etiquette. It's appropriate to politely decline at first, saying that it's too much. But if they insist, we shouldn't be stubborn. We can accept it and help share their gift with others, thereby showcasing their generosity. We might also be in a financially well-off situation. Or we might already be very frugal. What do we do with extra money? Are we just keeping it for our future use? Or for our children? Or can we broaden our heart like Yanzi and use our extra wealth to help those in need, starting with relatives and then extending out to those in society? When others criticize us, do we immediately argue our innocence? Do we explain our rationale and then tell them definitely that they are wrong? Or can we be humble like Yanzi? Conclusion Yanzi was a person that Confucius admired, and from his stories, it's pretty clear why! Although Laozi never mentioned Yanzi, I believe that Laozi would praise Yanzi too because Yanzi also role models Laozi's three treasures: compassion, frugality, and humility. As for us, admiration is not enough. We need to emulate his virtues in our daily life. In this way, Yanzi and the past sages would be proud of us. Weekly Wisdom #405

Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. One time, a relentless torrential rain lasted for seventeen days. Houses collapsed, food and grain became scarce, and the weather grew bitterly cold. Many people suffered from hunger and freezing temperatures, left with no shelter, trapped in a desperate plight. When Duke Jing heard of the disaster, he didn't do anything to help. Instead, he continued to indulge in lavish meals and spent his days and nights drinking and enjoying entertainment. (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you do?) Distressed by the people's suffering, Yanzi grew deeply anxious. He immediately requested that Duke Jing release the grain stored in the government granaries to relieve the disaster victims so that they could safely survive the crisis. Image Source: Gemini Yet despite Yanzi’s repeated pleadings, Duke Jing refused to agree. Furthermore, during this time of peril, the Duke dispatched a close minister named Bo to search the country for skilled singers and dancers. (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you do?) Although disappointed with the Duke, Yanzi still resolved to help the victims. He distributed the stored grain from his own estate to the disaster victims and provided his family's tools for them to use, doing everything in his power to assist them. Once he did everything in his own power to help, he decided to visit the Duke again. However, he did not ride his carriage like usual. Instead, he walked by foot. Upon seeing the Duke, Yanzi bowed and said: "The excessive rain has poured for seventeen days. So many houses have collapsed. So many households have nothing to eat. In this freezing weather, the elderly, the weak, women, and children lack clothes to fend off the cold, and they cannot find food to satisfy their hunger. Now, with walls collapsed and homes destroyed, they are left homeless, looking around in utter despair, weeping helplessly. Yet, Your Highness is not helping them, but instead drinking day and night, even sending Bo out to scout the country for singers and dancers. In the palace, the horses are fed with grain from the inner granary, and the dogs are fed with beef and mutton. The consorts across the three palaces are dressed in fine silks and enjoy delicacies. Comparing the two, is the treatment of your dogs, horses, and consorts not too extravagant? And is the treatment of the common people not too cruel? May I ask, when the villages are filled with desperate, starving, and freezing disaster victims who have nowhere to turn, how can Your Highness find the heart to drink and make merry? I am responsible for recording court affairs, serving alongside the officials at court to assist Your Highness in stabilizing the country and benefiting the people. Yet, the people are left starving, impoverished, and helpless, while Your Highness is immersed in wine and music, ignoring the victims. My offense is truly too great! Thus, with a heavy heart, I submit my resignation and will return to my hometown." He then gave his written resignation to the Duke, stood up and left swiftly. Image Source: Gemini (Pause: If you were Duke Jing, what would you do?) Hearing these heartfelt words, Duke Jing felt shocked and deeply ashamed. Soon after Yanzi departed, the Duke ran out after him, hoping to retain his services. However, the rainy day made the roads slippery and muddy. No matter how hard Duke Jing ran, he could not catch up with Yanzi. Fearing Yanzi would leave for good, he immediately ordered his attendants to ready the carriage and pursue him to his home. . When Duke Jing arrived at Yanzi’s residence, Yanzi was nowhere to be found. He only saw that the grain in Yanzi’s granary had all been taken by the disaster victims, and his tools were left scattered in disorder on the road. Duke Jing then drove his carriage further until he finally caught up with Yanzi at a crossroad. Seeing Yanzi, Duke Jing quickly stepped down from his carriage, walked up to him, and said: "I was wrong and didn't listen to you, so you left. Though I am not worthy of greatness, will you just abandon the common people? Please, remain by my side. I will distribute the grain and wealth stored in the inner granary to the disaster victims. The amount given shall be entirely at your command." Image Source: Gemini (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you do?) Hearing this, Yanzi was relieved and accepted the Duke's offer. Thus, Duke Jing reinstated Yanzi right there on the road, and Yanzi returned to the court. Upon returning to court, Yanzi immediately initiated a structured relief plan. Officials were dispatched to investigate the disaster victims and provide them with adequate food, clothing, firewood, and repair funds. The investigation was to be completed in three days, and any official who neglected their duty would be punished for disobeying orders. Duke Jing also stayed at the court to personally direct and supervise the ministers. He reduced his own daily meals, removing meat and wine. He ordered that horses no longer be fed grain and dogs no longer be fed meat porridge, while also cutting back the rewards given to his favorite courtiers. When the three-day deadline arrived, all responsible officials completed their tasks on schedule and reported the results of the relief efforts. They assisted 17,000 poor households, distributed 970,000 zhongs of grain, distributed 13,000 cartloads of firewood, and provided 3000 gold pieces of relief funds. Image Source: Gemini Following this, Duke Jing further reduced his meals, put away the zithers and harps, and ceased the display of bells and drums, sharing this difficult time with the disaster victims. Later, acting on Yanzi’s advice, Duke Jing dismissed his favored courtiers, as well as the singers, dancers, and those who encouraged idle pleasure. As a result, 3,000 favored maidservants were removed from the rolls, and three or four favored officials were expelled from the palace doors. The disaster relief work concluded successfully. The people were overjoyed, deeply grateful for the Duke's benevolence, and the whole nation weathered the crisis safely with unity. (Story Source) Commentary In another story, Duke Jing drank for seven days and nights, neglecting court duties. A minister named Hong Zhang couldn't take it anymore and said, "Your Grace has drunk for seven days! Please stop at once. If you will not, then grant me death instead!" I suspect Hong Zhang got a bit anxious and impatient with the Duke, which is why he said such words. I wondered what Yanzi might have done. This story seems to give an answer. If Yanzi truly did his utmost to advise his ruler, but the ruler still does not listen, then it seems he'll resign with a heavy heart. The drinking incident was less severe than this disaster incident, which might be why Yanzi didn't resign in the drinking incident. An important point to note is that Yanzi did not resign because he looks down on the Duke as a bad leader. Rather, he felt that it is his moral duty to help the Duke be the best ruler possible. If he lacks the ability to help the Duke be good, then he feels unqualified for the role, so he should not be receiving the high salary and benefits of the role. I think that's why when he went to see the Duke, he didn't dare to ride his carriage, and he first gave a bow to the Duke. Reflecting on ourselves, if we are employees, are we truly deserving of the salary we earn? Do we give our best to serve our employer and help our leader improve? Or do we just clock-in and clock-out with a "another day another dollar" attitude? If we are leaders, do we do our utmost to lead our followers towards a better future? If we are still students in school, do we do our best in our studies to be worthy of receiving the support from our parents, teachers, and nation? Fulfilling our moral duties is helping ourselves and others to accumulate merit and fortune. Neglecting our moral duties is cheating ourselves and others. I also wondered if Yanzi was using his resignation as a last resort to help awaken the Duke. But I think that's not his primary intent. Otherwise, why would he leave so swiftly? If he was using his resignation sort of as a threat to get the Duke to change, then he would leave slowly, hoping the Duke might say, "No, please, don't leave! I'll change!" I think Yanzi truly felt like he didn't deserve the role of minister, and he truly felt he failed at his job, which is why he left so swiftly. If the Duke wasn't so sincere in admitting his faults, requesting Yanzi to stay, and promising to follow Yanzi's advice, then I don't think Yanzi would have stayed. Yanzi follows morality, not any individual ruler. Besides, people can sense insincerity and ulterior motives. If Yanzi was just putting on a show, threatening to resign, then the Duke might feel like Yanzi is challenging his authority, in which case the Duke might just let him resign and not care about him. Such was the case with Hong Zhang. Thus, threatening others will not cause others to change out of their own accord, and I'm sure Yanzi understood this principle. Relating back to ourselves, we shouldn't threaten others to change. Instead, we need to awaken others' sense of morality so that they willingly change out of their own accord. In order to do that, we need to act with morality and set a virtuous example towards those around us. If others lack kindness, I role model kindness without demanding it from them. If others lack respect, I role model respect despite their disrespect towards me. When others see us treating them well despite them not treating us well, they will eventually feel ashamed, and their sense of morality will arise. Finally, I wonder what would've happened if the Duke didn't chase after Yanzi. I don't think Yanzi was betting on the Duke to chase after him. So what was his plan then? I speculate that he would find other ways to help the disaster victims or serve the people. I don't think he would go serve another state's ruler because that would be disloyal to his Duke. Maybe he would roam around different villages in the State of Qi, teaching people morality and life skills like Emperor Shun did. Or he might live as a recluse until Duke Jing or a future ruler sincerely asks him for his services, like what Zhuge Liang did. Those are just my speculations anyway. Conclusion As leaders, we ought to feel compassion for those below us, feel their suffering as our own suffering, and help them as we would help ourselves. This is the way to gain the people's hearts. No one is perfect, so it's also extremely important for leaders to listen to the advice and criticisms of all the subordinates and people. As subordinates, we ought to do our best to help our leader be the best leader they can be. We patiently advise with sincerity and respect. If the leader refuses to listen, we don't blame them as being too stubborn. Instead, we blame ourselves as lacking wisdom and credentials. We then reflect on whether we deserve the position we are in. When we set a moral and virtuous example, always focused on doing what's morally right, then we will have a clear conscience. Moreover, our morality will help awaken others' morality so that they will feel motivated to change out of their own accord. Weekly Wisdom #404

Yanzi lived at the time of Confucius and was highly respected by Confucius. Previously we looked at a few of his stories: How Yanzi diffused his ruler's anger How Yanzi humiliated his humiliator How Yanzi made his ruler look good How Yanzi graciously refused his ruler Today, we'll look at another story on how he turned his ruler's embarrassing situation into encouragement. Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. One day, Duke Jing had an urge to climb a tree and scoop out a sparrow's nest. He then pulled a chick out and saw that it was really small, so he gently placed the chick back inside the nest. Image Source: Gemini Yanzi found out about this incident, and he went at once to see the Duke. Since the Duke had just climbed a tree and put the sparrow back in its nest, he was sweating profusely, his clothing was messy, and his appearance no longer regal. Just as he turned his head, he saw Yanzi standing there, and he was a bit startled. (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you think of the Duke and say to him?) Yanzi bowed and asked, "May I ask what Your Grace was just doing to be in such a state?" The Duke sheepishly replied, "I was just looking for some sparrows to take, but when I saw the chicks were too small, I put them back." (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you say to the Duke?) Hearing this, Yanzi stepped back a little, turned to the north, and bowed twice. He congratulated the Duke, saying "My lord has the way of a sage king!" Image Source: Gemini The Duke was surprised and said, "I was merely taking sparrows and then putting them back because they were too small. What does that have to do with the way of a sage king?" Yanzi answered, “Your Grace took out the sparrows, but seeing they were too small, you returned them to the nest. This shows your compassion for the young and weak. If such kindness is extended even to birds, how much more will it be extended to people? This compassion is precisely the way of a sage king.” Hearing this, Duke Jing felt very encouraged and gained more motivation to be a great leader. (Story Source) Commentary When we see others do something silly or make a fool out of themselves, what do we do? Do we laugh at them? Or criticize them? What's the result? Perhaps they'll feel bad about themselves. Or they'll argue with us. Or worse, they’ll resent us. For Duke Jing, the ruler of a state, to be climbing a tree and taking sparrows from a nest was quite a silly sight. It's not a kingly thing to do. He became all sweaty, messy, and lost his majestic manner. Other people might've laughed or mocked him, but Yanzi did not. Instead, Yanzi covered up the Duke's embarrassment and turned it into praise by focusing on the spark of compassion within the Duke's actions. He seized the opportunity to encourage the Duke and guide him towards virtue. The Duke might not have thought about how he could be more kind towards his people, but when Yanzi told him that his kindness towards even little sparrows reflects the deep sage-like kindness within him, he would naturally be inspired to practice more kindness towards the people and emulate the past sage kings. This really shows how devoted Yanzi is to his ruler, seizing every opportunity to grow his ruler's virtues, to help the ruler govern well and benefit the people. If we truly want to help others succeed, we would do well to learn from Yanzi. Moreover, when the people around us are well, how can we not be lifted up with them? Conclusion The next time someone makes a mistake or does something silly, rather than laugh at them, think about how you could cover up for them and affirm their good points. When people get encouraged despite their mistakes, they will feel very grateful and be self-motivated to improve. Weekly Wisdom #403

Last time, we looked at the story of how Yanzi saved a stableman from death. This time, we'll look at another similar story. Around 2500 years ago, during the Spring and Autumn period of China's history, Duke Jing was the ruler of the State of Qi, and Yanzi was one of his trusted ministers. Duke Jing loved drinking alcohol, and one time, he drank so much that he fell into a coma for three whole days. When the Duke finally rose from bed, Yanzi came to see him. (Pause: If you were Yanzi, what would you say to the Duke?) Yanzi first bowed respectfully, then asked, "Your Grace is finally awake! How are you feeling? It seems last time the alcohol was too much for your body to handle?" The Duke sighed, "Yes. It seems so." Yanzi gently replied, “In ancient times, wine was not for excess. It was only to honor guests and strengthen bonds between friends. Men did not gather too often to drink, for it harmed their farming. Women did not feast too often, for it harmed their weaving. Even when they did gather, wine was never passed more than five rounds. Beyond that, punishment followed. But now, Your Grace drinks for one day and lies insensible for three. State affairs are abandoned, and your attendants grow corrupt. Those who once refrained from evil for fear of punishment now dare to act. Those who once did good in hope of reward lose heart. When a ruler strays from virtue, the people no longer respect reward or punishment. And when both virtue and justice are lost, the very foundation of the state collapses. I beg Your Grace: restrain your desire, lead by example, and guide the people with virtue!” Image Source: Gemini Seeing Yanzi's sincere devotion and the truth of his words, the Duke nodded. For a period of time, he restrained himself. But before long, wine called to him again. This time, he drank for seven days and seven nights without break. One of his ministers, Hong Zhang, could no longer bear it. He stepped before the Duke and declared, “Your Grace has drunk for seven days! Please stop at once. If you will not, then grant me death instead!” The Duke’s face darkened. To obey Hong Zhang seemed like weakness; to kill him felt too cruel. Unsure, he held his anger back. At that very moment, Yanzi entered. The Duke turned to him and said, “Hong Zhang dares to say, ‘Stop drinking or grant me death!’ If I listen, it seems I am ruled by my minister. But if I refuse and put him to death, my heart cannot bear it. What should I do?” (Pause. If you were Yanzi, how would you respond?) Yanzi bowed to the Duke, and then said, “Hong Zhang is fortunate indeed to serve under a ruler like you. Had he spoken like this to tyrant kings like Xia Jie or Shang Zhou, he would surely be dead already." Image Source: Gemini The Duke was startled. He realized that his every choice would influence his reputation for all of history, whether he would be praised as a good ruler or condemned as a tyrant. He also felt a little ashamed that Yanzi was saying he's a good ruler when he almost killed a loyal minister out of ego. He wanted to live up to Yanzi's praise, so he spared Hong Zhang. Thanks to the two loyal ministers, he also resolved to give up wine. (Story Source) Commentary This story has many perspectives that we can reflect on and learn from. Duke Jing's Role From Duke Jing's role, we can reflect on how harmful alcohol is. Like Yanzi said, it must be consumed with moderation for the purpose of strengthening bonds, not to be indulged in. If we are not careful and drink too much, we may lose our sense of rationality and end up doing terrible things that we regret deeply later. Alcohol isn't the only thing that harms our virtues. Any addiction is harmful. Thus, if we have bad addictions, it's important to overcome them as soon as possible to prevent them from harming ourselves and the people around us further. We also see the importance of having good friends and colleagues who advise us on what's right when we need it. The reason Duke Jing was able to have such devoted ministers must be a result of his humility and willingness to listen to advice. If we want to have good advisors in our life, we also need to cultivate our humility. Yanzi's Role From Yanzi, we should learn from how he was very considerate and upright in advising Duke Jing. He didn't scold the Duke out of anger, nor did he shy away from saying what needed to be said. He first showed consideration for the Duke's health and feelings. Before advising, he also gave a bow to show his respect. When he advised, he first talked about the impact the Duke's actions are having on the state, which shows that he is thinking for the greater good. He then says "I beg Your Grace", which reflects his humility and respect. He didn't say "You must quit drinking", as if he is in a higher position and able to order the Duke. In this way, the Duke felt respected, so he was able to accept all the rationale that Yanzi gave and did not argue back. When the Duke later drank for seven days, Yanzi didn't get upset and say, "Didn't you say last time that you would quit drinking? What's wrong with you! You're such a liar!" Such words would probably upset the drunken Duke and get him into deep trouble or danger. Instead, Yanzi praised the Duke, saying that he must be a good ruler because if he were a bad ruler, he would have sentenced Hong Zhang to death already. This reflects Yanzi's big heart. He is always looking for ways to help his ruler become virtuous and govern the people well. His sincere devotion would surely touch Duke Jing's heart, and the Duke would be self-motivated to improve himself to be worthy of Yanzi's faith in him. Hong Zhang's Role From Hong Zhang, we can learn from his uprightness. I think he probably urged the Duke politely to stop drinking many times during the course of seven days, but the Duke never listened. By the seventh day, Hong Zhang was truly worried for the Duke and the citizens, and he was willing to give up his life in order to shake the Duke awake. His selfless intention is very admirable, and it's not something most people can do. We can't say that his decision and actions were wrong per se. Perhaps if Yanzi wasn't there, and the Duke truly killed him, the Duke might understand Hong Zhang later and have the motivation to reform. In that case, Hong Zhang would have great merit. But it's also possible that the Duke would get a bad reputation for killing a loyal minister out of ego, and then the other ministers and citizens would lose trust in him, and other dukes of other states would look down on him. Duke Jing would then feel terrible about himself and degrade as a leader. Thus, it's very important to act with a calm mind and to weigh the pros and cons of all possibilities. If Hong Zhang acted out of anger towards the Duke, then he might not have thought about the negative consequences that his death might have. If he acted out of a calm mind with a kind intention for the Duke, then he might have already weighed the possibilities and decided that it's worth the risk. I wonder what Yanzi would have done. I think one principle Yanzi would grasp is that we need to wait for the right time to advise. When the Duke is drunk, his sense of judgment and rationality is muddled. That's not a good time to rationalize with the Duke. That's probably why Yanzi waited until the Duke sobered up before advising last time. If he really wanted to try to shock the Duke awake, maybe he might blame himself for being a bad minister, unable to help his Duke overcome addiction to alcohol, and then plead the Duke to punish him. These are just my speculations. Concluding Thoughts When learning such historic stories, we need to learn from each person's mistakes and prevent them in our lives. We also need to learn from each person's strengths and emulate them. Do we have any addictions like Duke Jing that we ought to overcome? Are we humble and willing to accept advice like Duke Jing? Are we considerate, upright, and timely in advising like Yanzi? Are we always seeking to help others grow their virtues like Yanzi? Do we get a bit hot-headed and act on a whim like Hong Zhang? Or can we maintain our calm in triggering situations and weigh the pros and cons of all possibilities? Weekly Wisdom #402

The Daily Stoic is a book with 366 quotes from Stoic philosophers on how to live a good life. I had previously read this a couple years ago and benefited a lot from it, and I've decided to read it again this year. Every day, I read the quote, the explanation, and then journal my thoughts and reflections. At the end of each month, I review my reflections and summarize the month. The theme for June is "problem solving", and this article will summarize my June reflections: Mindset of growth and adaptability Having faith in ourselves Wisdom Calm and focus Image Source: GPT 1: Mindset of Growth and Adaptability June 1: "Indeed, no one can thwart the purposes of your mind—for they can't be touched by fire, steel, tyranny, slander, or anything." —Marcus Aurelius Problems, obstacles, and difficulties are inevitable in life. But they don’t have to get us down. Whether we fall or rise in the face of problems is not determined by the problem, but rather by our mindset. Even if “bad” things occur, we can still make good use of it to grow our virtues and abilities. That would be turning an initially bad thing into a good thing. Ryan Holiday gives some examples: "If a friend betrays us, our reverse clause is to learn from how this happened and how to forgive this person's mistake. If we're thrown in prison, our reverse clause is that we can refuse to be broken by this change of events and try to be of service to our fellow prisoners. When a technical glitch erases our work, our reverse clause is that we can start fresh and do it better this time. Our progress can be impeded or disrupted, but the mind can always be changed—it retains the power to redirect the path." Adaptability is not just emphasized in Stoicism. Daoism praises water as the symbol of greatest goodness. Why? One reason is water’s adaptability. It is able to flow around any obstacle. Buddhism teaches people to always accord with the conditions. That means instead of resisting the way things are and opposing other people, find a way to accept the way things are and use them tactfully to improve yourself and help others. Thus, a difference between philosophers and common people is that philosophers respond virtuously and effectively towards adversity, while common people sink into negative emotion. June 3: "He can't serve in the military? Let him seek public office. Must he live in the private sector? Let him be a spokesperson. Is he condemned to silence? Let him aid his fellow citizens by silent public witness. Is it dangerous to enter the Forum? Let him display himself, in private homes, at public events and gatherings, as a good associate, faithful friend, and moderate tablemate. Has he lost the duties of a citizen? Let him exercise those of a human being." —Seneca Another trait of philosophers is adaptability. Their purpose in life is to elevate their virtues and help others in the process. There are infinite paths to achieve this goal, and they are not stubborn or attached to any particular path. If this path doesn’t work, then I’ll find another path. If that path doesn’t work, I’ll find another. Such is the adaptability and determination of a Stoic. Icon Source June 30: "While it's true that someone can impede our actions, they can't impede our intentions and our attitudes, which have the power of being conditional and adaptable. For the mind adapts and converts any obstacle to its action into a means of achieving it. That which is an impediment to action is turned to advance action. The obstacle on the path becomes the way." —Marcus Aurelius Again, philosophers aren’t afraid of difficulties. They view them as opportunities to elevate their cultivation. Ryan Holiday gives some more examples: If someone prevents you from getting to your destination on time, then this is a chance to practice patience. If an employee makes an expensive mistake, this is a chance to teach a valuable lesson. If a computer glitch erases your work, it's a chance to start over with a clean slate. If someone hurts you, it's a chance to practice forgiveness. If something is hard, it is a chance to get stronger. Icon Source This reminds me of a quote by Venerable Master Jing Kong: "In unfavorable circumstances, accord with the conditions, have no anger or resentment, and all your negative karma shall be eliminated. In favorable circumstances, accord with the conditions, have no greed or irrationality, and all your fortune and wisdom shall manifest." Thus, no matter if we are in favorable or unfavorable circumstances, we should have the same mindset: to continually elevate our cultivation. In unfavorable circumstances, we need to be ever more cautious and diligent in our cultivation. In favorable circumstances, we need to be vigilant to prevent vices from arising and continue to be diligent in cultivation. In this way, no matter if we are facing problems or fortune, we will constantly be growing and creating a better future. My Practice Cultivation is all about changing our bad habits, and one way to do that is to create if-then rules for frequent triggers. I think this is very similar to what Ryan Holiday said about having reverse-clauses. If possible, we should try to predict problems or triggers and set up our reverse clauses in advance while we’re in a calm state of mind. But sometimes, we’ll get caught off-guard with unexpected problems. When that happens, we should try to calm down, and then think about how we can use the difficulty to cultivate ourselves. When hearing a principle and examples, it’s important that we can relate to ourselves and make inferences. Below are some examples of reverse clauses that I’ve made for myself that are relevant to my daily life: When others interrupt me while I’m busy, it’s a chance to cultivate selflessness and humility. Instead of demanding them to be more considerate, I should put down my matter and give them my full attention. If others don’t keep their promises, it’s a chance for me to practice tolerance and patience. Don’t get annoyed or criticize them. Instead, remind them again with respect, and make sure I set a good example of keeping my promises. If I or others make a mistake, don’t get critical. It’s a chance to practice calmness and kindness, as well as to extract learnings and create confidence that we’ll do better next time. If other drivers on the road are very rushed and unsafe, I shouldn’t start complaining about them. It’s a chance for me to practice tolerance and being principled. Whether others do the right thing is not important. What’s important is that I do what’s right. Adaptability is also related to personality. Some personalities are very quick-on-their-feet and don’t mind unexpected changes. Other personalities prefer to plan everything ahead of time, and when things don’t go according to their plans, they easily get annoyed. That’s my personality. Each personality has their strengths and weaknesses, and we should all hone our strengths and mitigate our weaknesses. After learning ancient philosophies, I’ve improved on being able to both plan in advance and adapt to inevitable problems. Moreover, in my planning, I will think about possible problems that may arise, mitigation measures, and responses to the problem. Icon Sources: 1, 2 For example, recently I’ve been planning a trip back to China. There are so many things to plan and book, from the plane tickets to train tickets to hotels. There are also many factors that remain unknown, like the health condition of my grandma, which then determines how long I should stay there and whether or not I will take a trip to Taiwan. But I remind myself: the important thing is that I plan ahead to the best of my ability with the knowledge I have at the time. Chances are, my plans will encounter problems, and when that happens, the important thing is to keep calm and adapt. In fact, I’ve already had curve balls come up, and I’ve already had to adjust my plans. Whether or not I get frustrated is not dependent on the external matters, but on my attitude. If I want things to always go according to my plans, then of course I’ll get frustrated. But if I expect problems and focus on cultivating my calm and adaptability, then I’ll be calmer and happier. When I hear “the obstacle is the way”, I think that life doesn’t always give us what we want, but it gives us what we need to grow in our journey. Therefore, obstacles are the way for our growth. For example, as a teacher, I’m not wishing for really difficult students. But when I reflect on my growth as a teacher, it is truly the tough students that forced me to improve myself. When I improved myself, they improved too, and that gave me more confidence in my learning and practice. Thus, if we want to be true philosophers, and our goal is to continuously grow our virtues, then really, the obstacle is the way. 2: Having Faith in Ourselves The first criteria to overcoming problems is the belief that we can do it. If we don’t even believe we can do it, then we won’t try. The tougher the challenge, the more faith we must have in ourselves. June 4: "Don't forget, though, that you come from a long, unbroken line of ancestors who survived unimaginable adversity, difficulty, and struggle. It's their genes and their blood that run through your body right now… as their viable offspring, you're capable of what they are capable of. You're meant for this." —Ryan Holiday June 10: "If you find something very difficult to achieve yourself, don't imagine it impossible—for anything possible and proper for another person can be achieved as easily by you." —Marcus Aurelius June 29: "Of course it's possible to curb our arrogance, control our anger, and be a caring person. How do you think others do it? Certainly their parents weren't perfect; they didn't come out of the womb incapable of ego or immune to temptation. They worked on it. They made it a priority…They became who they are. Just like you can." —Ryan Holiday When we feel that our situation is extremely tough, we should remember that our ancestors faced tougher situations. I will think about all the adversity that ancient philosophers faced. Marcus Aurelius faced a lot of illness, which tempered his will. Seneca had a student who became a tyrant king and sentenced him to death, but Seneca remained serene. Epictetus was a slave, but that didn’t stop him from being a renowned teacher in Stoic history. Confucius was trapped for 7 days without food, rejected by so many rulers, and almost assassinated many times, but that didn’t deter his faith in morality, and he later on became the most revered sage teacher in Chinese history. Venerable Jing Kong endured so much unfair humiliation. His benefactor frequently disrespected him in front of others, but he always respected her. So many people wanted to “bring down Venerable Jing Kong” because they thought he was promoting a false sutra. Many years later, when he was proven correct, he held no resentment. These are just some examples that come to my mind, and I remind myself that those heroes were all people. I am a person too. We all have the same blood, genes, and potential. If they can do it, I can do it too, so long as I am willing and persevere in my cultivation. Icon Source June 16: "Don't be ashamed of needing help. You have a duty to fulfill just like a soldier on the wall of battle. So what if you are injured and can't climb up without another soldier's help?" —Marcus Aurelius No person achieves greatness alone. We all need the support and aid of others. Wanting to seem almighty and self-sufficient is ego, and ego impedes our growth. Instead, we should be dedicated towards a moral purpose and enlist the aid of others. Humility combined with a worthy aspiration fuels growth. Habit change research also talks about the importance of accountability. For example, if we want to start meditating, we could find a meditation buddy or keep a streak going. We could also ask someone to give us rewards and punishments based on criteria that we set for ourselves. Not only is there no shame in asking for help, it’s oftentimes the wise thing to do. My Practice When I first started learning about philosophy and heard stories of past philosophers and sages, I felt like these people were a different breed, that they were just born sages, and us normal people can’t compare. Later, I realized that if we try to emulate the things that they did, it seems really hard, but if we try to emulate their virtues in our own situations, then it’s very doable. For example, I can’t imagine being sentenced to death by my own student who became a tyrant king yet still be able to remain serene. But if I encounter a conflict, I could ask myself, “What would Seneca do in my situation? He said that wherever there is another person, there is an opportunity for kindness. He would remain calm and kind.” Then go do it! If they can do it, so can I. Thus, it’s not that hard to emulate the sages. But what I really admire about sages is that their first reaction towards such tough situations is always so wise and kind. Meanwhile, my first reaction is negative. But even sages weren’t born like that. To attain such a level of cultivation really requires a long period of time. For example, Marcus Aurelius often reflected on his faults in his journal and urged himself to improve. Stories from Venerable Jing Kong’s earlier years compared to his later years show that he clearly elevated his cultivation as time went on. Confucius summarized the stages of his cultivation: “At fifteen, I set my aspiration on learning. At thirty, I established myself. At forty, I had no more doubts. At fifty, I knew my heavenly mandate. At sixty, my ears were attuned. At seventy, I could follow my heart’s desires without overstepping bounds.” (Original Text: 吾十有五而志于学，三十而立，四十而不惑，五十而知天命，六十而耳顺，七十而从心所欲，不踰矩。) In other words, Confucius spent 15 years learning and cultivating before he felt that he had a very firm foundation at age 30. Of course, he was probably being humble to say he took 15 years, but still, it certainly wasn’t one or two years. After having a firm foundation established, it took another 10 years of accumulation to reach the point of no doubts, when he could skillfully handle all sorts of unique situations and exceptions. At fifty, he knew with utmost confidence his purpose in life and what he was meant to do for the world. At sixty, his ears were attuned, meaning that he was really good at hearing the true meaning behind people’s words, and that nothing people said could irritate him. At seventy, he could follow his heart’s desires without overstepping bounds, meaning that his every thought was always naturally aligned with morality. No matter what favorable or unfavorable circumstances he encountered, he always naturally abided in proper thoughts. Therefore, cultivation takes time, and we need to have patience, determination, and persistence to reach attainment. Having good teachers and friends to support us is in our cultivation journey is also essential. Icon Sources: 1, 2, 3 Although Confucius took 15 years to establish himself and another 10 years to attain mastery, that doesn’t mean everyone needs that amount of time. Teachers hope that their students will surpass them, and we have an advantage compared to Confucius in that we have Confucius’ teachings to learn from. We certainly shouldn’t think we have 15 years and then be lazy. We should learn and cultivate diligently and make our ancestors and teachers proud. 3: Wisdom When it comes to solving problems, wisdom is critical. Making the right choice leads to smooth sailing. Making the wrong choice creates a chain of further problems. June 2: "How beautifully Plato put it. Whenever you want to talk about people, it's best to take a bird's-eye view and see everything all at once—of gatherings, armies, farms, weddings and divorces, births and deaths, noisy courtrooms or silent spaces, every foreign people, holidays, memorials, markets—all blended together and arranged in a pairing of opposites." —Marcus Aurelius The way I interpret this quote is to look at situations from multiple perspectives. I often think of a related quote from Liao Fan’s Four Lessons: “Do not just consider the present action, consider the side effects. Do not just consider short-term effects, consider the long-term effects. Do not just consider the effects on one person, consider the effects on the greater whole.” When we can see a situation from more perspectives, we get a more complete picture of the situation, which then allows us to make better decisions. Image Source: Unsplash Common people often just think from their perspective in the short-term. Wise people think of unintended side effects, long-term effects, effects on the greater whole, and the perspectives of all related parties. For more on this topic, check out Wise Principles for Great Decisions. June 9: "There is no vice which lacks a defense, none at the outset isn't modest and easily intervened—but after this the trouble spreads widely. If you allow it to get started you won't be able to control when it stops. Every emotion is at first weak. Later it rouses itself and gathers strength as it moves along—it's easier to slow it down than to supplant it." —Seneca Seneca is saying that every vice has its counteracting virtue. As cultivators, we should know which vices we have and which virtues we are working on to counteract them. To give some examples: Giving counteracts selfishness and greed Patience and understanding counteracts anger Diligent learning counteracts ignorance and doubt Humility and respect counteract arrogance Calmness counteracts agitation Carefulness counteracts carelessness Moreover, wise people nip problems in the bud, preventing them from accumulating into big problems. Therefore, even small vices should be taken seriously and eliminated ruthlessly, let alone large ones. Image Source: Gemini June 6: "Just because you've begun down one path doesn't mean you're committed to it forever, especially if that path turns out to be flawed or impeded. At that same time, this is not an excuse to be flighty or incessantly noncommittal." —Ryan Holiday June 22: "It's been said that the definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result…We must consciously opt to do things differently—to tweak and change until we get the result we're after." —Ryan Holiday The reality is, we often do not have 100% information before making a decision, and things are always changing. Therefore, we shouldn’t think that once we make a decision, our work is done. It’s very important to monitor the situation after a decision is made and see if we are getting good results. If not, then we need to promptly reassess and adjust. June 12: "In this way you must understand how laughable it is to say, 'Tell me what to do!' What advice could I possibly give? No, a far better request is, 'Train my mind to adapt to any circumstance.'… In this way, if circumstances take you off script…you won't be desperate for a new prompting." —Epictetus Wisdom is different from knowledge. Learning knowledge is simply memorizing facts. Wisdom is being able to apply principles flexibly to any situation. We have to internalize and digest teachings in order to turn knowledge into our own wisdom. For example, when Ryan Holiday gave examples of reverse-clauses, knowledge is simply knowing those examples. We have to contemplate and relate to our own lives to infer our own examples. That is learning wisdom instead of just knowledge. My Practice When I make important decisions, I first make sure my mind is calm, and I give myself plenty of time to consider and reconsider. I try to think from multiple perspectives and seek the advice of wise people. If there are a lot of factors to weigh, I’ll meditate on the decision. When the mind is tranquil, insight arises. After making decisions, I know that I have to keep monitoring the situation and adjust in the face of new information. As for counteracting vices, the examples I gave before are all from my own merit-fault journal. By cultivating these virtues, I also prevent the corresponding vices from growing. In terms of learning, I always try to apply the principles I learn into my own life. Understanding feeds practice, and practice deepens understanding. Once our practice and understanding reaches a certain level, we’ll be able to make inferences and flexibly adapt to different situations. 4: Calm and Focus Wisdom arises from a calm and focused mind. Thus, we need to practice our ability to calm and focus the mind so that when we encounter unexpected problems, we can handle it effectively. June 19: "Don't let your reflection on the whole sweep of life crush you. Don't fill your mind with all the bad things that might still happen. Stay focused on the present situation and ask yourself why it's so unbearable and can't be survived." —Marcus Aurelius When we encounter what may seem like a terrible disaster, it’s easy to get really emotional and anxious about the future. However, this is not only not helpful, it’s harmful. Being anxious about the future is not going to make the problem go away, and we might act irrationally and make bad choices due to our negative emotions. So how can we calm ourselves down? One tactic is to just focus on the present, on the next step. Take it one step at a time. Image Source: Unsplash As long as we can keep doing the correct next step, the future will surely get better. Once we feel calm, we can then try to think more long-term and from multiple perspectives. June 21: "We should take wandering outdoor walks, so that the mind might be nourished and refreshed by the open air and deep breathing." —Seneca For less serious situations, we can calm and relax the mind by simply going outside for a walk, especially in nature. The principle here is to take timely breaks. The quality of our work and choices depends on the state of our mind. Thus, we need to be aware of our mental state and promptly refresh the mind when it starts getting tired. Image Source: Unsplash My Practice I meditate every morning to train my focus, and I also practice mantra recitation throughout the day to maintain a calm and clear state of mind. In this way, when sudden problems arise, it’s easier for me to stay calm. If I have to make a big decision, I will also meditate on it. I’m the type of person that likes to have really long work sessions, and I’ll push through until the end. But sitting too long is not good for our health, so I’ve made a conscious effort to take more timely breaks. It could be as simple as doing some stretches or walking to the kitchen to drink some water. I also like to go for a walk after meals, which aids digestion and clears the mind. Conclusion June was all about problem-solving. The most important factor to problem solving is our attitude. If we have a good attitude, we will be able to stay positive, rise to the challenge, and improve ourselves in the process. If we have a bad attitude, we’ll get upset and create suffering. The Stoics urge us to have an attitude of growth and adaptability. We view everything as an opportunity to elevate our virtues. In this way, there is nothing that cannot be adapted and used to our advantage. Secondly, we need to have faith in ourselves. No matter how big the problem in front of us, we must have confidence in our ability to handle it. We should remember that our ancestors have handled much bigger problems. They have passed down their DNA and teachings to us, so there’s no reason we cannot handle our problems. Third, we need to cultivate wisdom. Wisdom allows us to make effective decisions, and wisdom comes from learning and from a calm mind. It’s important to continually learn philosophy and apply it in our daily lives. Understanding and practice mutually fuel each other, allowing us to gradually gain mastery over the teachings so that we can apply the teachings flexibly in a variety of situations. It’s also important to practice calming and focusing the mind every day so that when we encounter sudden problems, we can remain calm and use the teachings. What problems are you facing currently? How can the teachings from this month help? Weekly Wisdom #401